Tremors
by ciaddict
Summary: Sequel to Family. The continuing story of Bobby and Annie with a bit of Mike and Sarah thrown in , set during season 4 of LOCI.
1. Chapter 1

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 1**

_As always, I do not own any Law and Order Criminal Intent characters. The others, though, are my own and they are providing hours of entertainment for me as they interact with Dick Wolf's fabulous creations. This first chapter is woven in and around "Semi-Detached" and "Great Barrier", and leads into "Eosphorus". I know that two other episodes separated "Semi-Detached" and "Great Barrier", but according to the time stamps in each of the episodes, they happened one after the other, perhaps even overlapping. So that is how they will occur here. _

_Thank you to spook for her tireless beta work. One of the joys that writing fanfic has brought is the opportunity to talk to other writers and toss ideas around for whatever stories we are each working on. I have to thank squarey for suggestions on how to weave Nicole Wallace's words to Bobby into the alternate universe I have created for him. I hope it works as well as it sounded in my head. And thank you to flashymom as well for an idea that…well, I don't want to spoil it here since it will play out over two chapters. I'll just let you read it and give her credit afterwards. _

Sarah Johnson stood looking at the words on the headstone. There weren't many people in the cemetery this early in the morning, although she could see that there was a grave prepared for a service later in the day. There had been a spring rain during the night and the grass was slightly soggy. She hoped that it would not rain again today; funerals in the rain seemed all the more sad.

_Anthony Lee Johnson_

_November 30, 1967-April 10, 2002_

_Beloved Husband and Father_

Those words, true though they were, seemed so inadequate to describe what he had meant to her life, to his daughter's life. Did he know how important he was? Sarah smiled as she thought that yes, he knew. She and Tony had been so close for so long, they knew what they meant to one another.

She sighed as she knelt and laid a single rose on the headstone. This was the second anniversary of Tony's death. She reached out and traced the letters with her finger.

"Well, Handsome," she said, "it's been two years now. I still miss you. Jia Li doesn't remember you, but I've told her all about you. We look at pictures and I tell her stories. But you know people think it's time for me to move on. And I think maybe they are right. I don't know if I'll ever get married again; I can't really picture being married to anyone else. And I don't know if I'll ever love anyone the way I loved you. But I'd like to find out. Because the truth is, I'm lonely without you. Jia Li makes it easier, I think. But….I miss having someone to share all the responsibilities and the joy with. Uncle Jimmy said not to let anyone rush me into something I'm not ready for, so maybe I need to take small steps. Sooo…..I think the first place I need to start is to stop wearing my wedding ring. And I hope that's OK with you."

Sarah slipped the ring from her finger. She looked at it lying in her hand for a moment before dropping it into her purse. She kissed her forefinger and then touched it to the engraving of Tony's name.

"Bye, Handsome," she said softly. "I love you."

She got to her feet and quickly walked away towards the Cadillac parked a short distance away.

******************************************************************

Mike Logan leaned against the stone lion in front of the Humanities and Social Sciences Library, looking across the street at the Mid-Manhattan Library. It had rained the night before, but the sun came out and it turned out to be a warm spring day. It was lunch time and he had needed to question a suspect at Riker's Island. On the way back to Staten Island he went by way of the library, as he had so often in the few months that he and Sarah were dating.

He caught sight of her walking up the street and knew that she had gone to the park to eat her lunch. Her dark, wavy hair was pulled back into a pony tail that bounced with each step. He watched her walk up the steps of the library and go in through the heavy doors. He stayed there for several more minutes even though he could no longer see her.

"You are truly pathetic, Logan," he said under his breath.

Heaving a heavy sigh and pulling piece of gum out of his pocket, Mike pushed away from the lion. He put the gum in his mouth, threw the wrapper in the trash, and headed back to Staten Island.

******************************************************************

Alex Eames walked from the kitchen to the living room, stopping a moment to watch Tom Spencer snuggling her tiny nephew, just five months old, in his arms. She smiled at the gentleness of the big man, thinking that she shouldn't be surprised. She had seen her big partner with his children and knew that size didn't seem to be an obstacle to gentleness and tenderness. Tom looked up and smiled at her.

"He's sound asleep. Do you want me to put him in his crib?"

Alex nodded, moving ahead of him into her bedroom. Tom laid the sleeping baby in the travel crib that had come with him to his Aunt Alex's so he could spend the night. Alex ran a hand gently over his legs and rounded belly encased in his fleece footed sleeper. Tom followed her to the kitchen.

"Dinner will be ready in a few minutes," she told him.

"You know," he said, pulling Alex into his arms, "neither of us has to work tomorrow. Seems like a good opportunity for a sleep over."

"Sorry, you know I'm only allowed one male overnight guest at a time. And he has seniority."

"Lucky guy," he said as he lowered his head to kiss her.

******************************************************************

"Fine!"

"Fine! I'm going to bed!"

Annie had stomped halfway up the stairs before she remembered the children were in bed. She stopped and tried to calm herself before continuing up the stairs. She turned and looked down in time to see the back of Bobby's head as he headed towards the basement and his office.

_His office_, she thought sullenly, _more like his bedroom these days._

She took a deep breath and headed the rest of the way up the stairs. She checked the children's rooms and was relieved to see that they were all sleeping. At least they hadn't heard them arguing this time.

This time. She sighed as she undressed and pulled her pajamas on. The children hadn't heard them this time, but there were plenty of other arguments they had heard lately. It was getting harder and harder to contain them to times and places that they wouldn't be overheard. The things they argued over were almost always simple, silly things. But more and more often they were escalating to the point that Bobby would sometimes sleep on the leather sofa in his office.

The increasing frequency of their arguments worried Annie. It was difficult for her to understand what Bobby was thinking these days, and that frightened her. It hadn't happened before in their marriage and she didn't know what to do about it. Frances still refused to see Annie; at least that was what Bobby told her. She was beginning to suspect that he didn't even discuss it with his mother anymore, that he had simply accepted this as their new routine. She also suspected that he was still angry with her about the rift between her and her mother-in-law. But she really didn't know what he thought about it because the subject had become off-limits; he refused to talk to her about anything having to do with his mother.

He had also been increasingly silent about his work. She was used to the two of them talking about their jobs, sharing what details they could without violating confidentiality. Usually when Bobby discussed a case with her he didn't reveal much more than what she could read in the paper, but he did share his feelings about the case. But he hadn't mentioned work for a few weeks now. When she asked he just told her work was "fine".

It was May and soon school would be out. In June, Bobby was planning to take the twins on a fishing trip while Annie and Ally had a "girls" weekend. In July, the children would be going to camp for a week. It would be the first time for the twins and they were looking forward to it eagerly. Although it was hard to think of her boys being away from her in the woods for an entire week at only seven years old, another part of her was looking forward to having a week alone with Bobby.

He didn't sleep in his office that night. He came in while Annie was still sitting up in bed reading. They didn't speak as he moved around the room getting ready for bed. She tried to concentrate on her book, but found herself watching him. He got into bed and sat next to her; he didn't reach for his book, but sat looking at his hands in his lap for a few minutes. Finally he turned to look at her. She knew he was ready to talk and laid her book on the table next to the bed.

"Annie, I need to tell you something," he began. Annie turned to face him and sit cross-legged. Bobby looked at her and sighed. "Eames and I have been investigating the death of Ray Garnett."

Surprised that he was actually bringing up his work, she said, "That 'shock jock'? I thought he committed suicide."

"He did. But he was driven to it by someone manipulating his medication. We made an arrest this morning. The prescribing nurse from a clinic he went where he had sought treatment for an addiction to pain medicine."

"A nurse?! That's terrible!"

"Yeah, it is." Bobby looked at her for a moment. "I need to talk to you about that nurse."

"What about her?"

"I, uh, played her while we were investigating her. Let her think I was interested in her. I told her about my mother as a hook to get her interested in helping me. And it worked. She gave me information on medications and support groups." He reached over and opened the drawer in the bedside table. He pulled out some papers and handed them to Annie. She looked them over, noting the neat, even handwriting.

"This is all information you already know from your own research," she said, handing them back to him.

"Yeah, it is. But she went to a lot of effort to find this information for me. And talking to her about my mother felt….I don't know….she was so….empathetic."

"Empathetic," she repeated. "Unlike your wife, you mean?"

"Annie…" He reached for her hand but she pulled away and got off the bed, pacing around the room.

"You are more comfortable talking to a murderer about your mother than talking to me? I don't even know what to do with that, Bobby."

Bobby sighed. "I know you don't, Annie. Neither do I. I just thought….you would want to know."

She stood and looked at him for a moment. "Yes, I do. I guess," she said finally.

She got back in bed and Bobby pulled her into his arms. "I love you," he murmured, holding her close.

"I love you, too."

"Do you think you could get some time off work when the kids go to camp?"

"I might be able to. Why?"

"I thought maybe we could go somewhere, just the two of us."

"OK, I'll put in a request tomorrow."

Bobby kissed her and it occurred to her, not for the first time, that they frequently used sex as a way to end an argument. She wondered for a moment if it was the best way to deal with the friction between them. But then Bobby's lips were kissing her throat and moving lower as his hands pulled her clothes off. She pushed her doubts to the back of her mind and relaxed in his arms.

The next day Bobby and Alex caught a new case; a diamond thief murdered in the subway, seemingly by his own partner. They put in long hours over the next few days. On Friday night, Bobby came home late. He was obviously distracted and said little to Annie or the children. He was in his office when Annie went to bed, a common occurrence in recent months. She had just begun to drift into sleep when she felt him get into bed.

"Annie," he said softly. She reluctantly fought the sleep trying to overtake her and turned towards him. "I have to go in tomorrow."

"OK," she murmured drowsily.

"I need to talk to you; are you awake?"

She sighed, opened her eyes, and pushed herself to a sitting position. She waited for him to continue, dreading another revelation like the one he had told her just a few days before.

"Nicole is back," he said simply.

"What?" She was completely unprepared for this particular revelation. "Well, she and her husband live here. I guess she was bound to turn up sooner or later. Did you see her?"

"No, but the description we got from a witness has to be her. We are trying to locate her partner."

"Witness, partner…is she involved in another murder?"

"That's what we think."

"Great," Annie sighed. She lay back down and said, "Now what?"

"We investigate and try to find her. Just….call me if…if you hear from her. OK?"

She nodded. "OK."

The next day, Saturday, seemed endless to Bobby as he and Eames interviewed Nicole's now ex-husband, picked up her partner/lover, sat through the video of his first interview with Nicole, and finally came face to face with her in the squad room. This encounter was different from the other ones that he'd had with her; Nicole seemed different and it concerned him. He told Eames and Captain Deakins, "I smell blood in the water."

Annie didn't work on Monday and she spent the morning cleaning the house. After lunch she went grocery shopping, intending to pick the children up from school on her way home. She was picking through the apples when she felt eyes on her. She looked up to see a familiar face watching her.

"My, you certainly make healthy food choices for your family," said Nicole. When Annie didn't respond she went on, "Your husband is beginning to very much annoy me with his meddling. He couldn't stand seeing me happily married last year, and his interference cost me my marriage. Now he has found that I am quite happy in another relationship and he has set about to destroy it as well. Have you considered, Annie, that Bobby has an ulterior motive for this obvious vendetta against me?"

Annie's mouth was dry. Her previous two confrontations with Nicole had not frightened her; she had sensed that Nicole was only toying with her as a way to get to Bobby. But today was different. She could see it in Nicole's demeanor and in her eyes. She hoped she didn't look as afraid as she suddenly felt. She swallowed and tried to answer calmly.

"His only motive is that of a cop trying to get a murderer off the street."

"Ah, the trusting little woman, standing by her man." Nicole laughed humorlessly. "You keep telling yourself that, Annie. But ask yourself if Bobby has shown this kind of obsession towards any other suspect he has investigated. For some reason your husband can't stand to see me in a relationship and will do anything he can to come between me and the person I'm in love with. Why do you suppose that is? Well, I won't tolerate it any longer. Be sure to tell him that when you tell him about this conversation."

"Are you threatening me?" Annie's heart sped up a bit.

"Oh of course not, darling! That would be a foolish thing to do. Threatening the wife of one of New York's finest could land a person in jail, now couldn't it? I just thought that woman to woman, as someone who understands love and jealousy, you would see how unhealthy it is for your husband to be so obsessed. I'll let you get back to your shopping now. Perhaps we could get together for lunch one of these days. Do take care of yourself and your lovely children."

Annie didn't move as she watched her walk away. She watched through the large windows as Nicole got into a car and drove away. Annie left her basket of groceries in the produce aisle; she pulled her cell phone out of her purse and dialed Bobby's number as she headed out of the store. By the time she reached her SUV, she had told him everything Nicole said. She told him that she was on her way to pick up the children from school. Annie's description of Nicole's words and her manner confirmed the assessment he had made after his encounter with her a few days earlier.

"Bobby," she said, "this was different from the other times. She just seemed to be playing with me before. This time she scared me."

"I think you and the kids should go to Connecticut. Today, as soon as you pick the kids up. Don't go home, just drive to Grandpa's." He hesitated a moment, then added, "I need to know you're safe, Babe."

"I know," she said softly. "Do you...do you think she might be following me now? Waiting for me to pick the kids up?"

"No, I don't think so. I think this was just a warning. But if you see anyone following you, call me right away."

"OK, I will. I love you."

"I love you, Annie."

So, for the second time in just over a year, Annie and the children headed for Connecticut because of Nicole Wallace. Annie called Grandpa while she waited for the children and told him they were coming. She explained the reason briefly and said that they would talk about it more that night when the children were asleep. It was difficult to know what to tell the kids. They asked questions she couldn't really answer truthfully. She didn't want them to know the real reason for their unexpected trip to Grandpa's; she didn't want them to be afraid.

Finally Ally asked, "Are you and Daddy getting divorced?"

"What?!" This wasn't a question Annie had anticipated. "No, of course not! Why would you think that?"

"Well, you and Daddy yell a lot and now we're going to Grandpa's and it's not even a weekend. Suzy's mommy and daddy yelled a lot and then her mommy took her to her grandma's house and then her mommy and daddy got divorced."

Now Phillip asked, "If you and Daddy get divorced, who will we live with?"

"Tommy lives with his mommy one week and then lives with his daddy one week," said Andrew.

"Suzy says that's called a 'fifty-fifty split'," Allie added knowledgeably.

"And Sam lives with his mommy and goes to visit his daddy sometimes on weekends," continued Andrew.

"Carla's daddy doesn't ever come to see her," said Phillip.

"Laura lives with her daddy 'cause her mommy moved far away," Allie confided.

"Daddy and I are not getting divorced," Annie said emphatically. She wasn't sure that fear of their parents getting divorced was much easier for them to live with than fear of a killer coming after them. "We argue sometimes and sometimes we are too loud, but that doesn't mean we are getting divorced. The four of us are just going to visit Grandpa for a few days to make sure he is OK. I want to check on him because of his heart attack last year. Daddy has to work and can't come with us. That's all there is to it."

Thankfully that seemed to satisfy them and they began talking about school and friends. They stopped for dinner on the way and Annie was glad that they all fell asleep for the rest of the drive. At least she was glad at first. But she began to miss the sound of their voices as her mind had the freedom to think about Nicole and worry about Bobby.

On Tuesday Bobby and Alex uncovered a plot to kill Nicole's ex-husband. They didn't have enough evidence to arrest her, but they did uncover the fact that she had a child who died. On Mr. Carver's suggestion, they brought her in on Wednesday as a material witness. After artfully steering the discussion to children and pregnancy, Alex left Bobby alone in the interrogation room with Nicole. As he questioned her about her supposed infertility Nicole once again demonstrated her ability to hone in on a person's biggest insecurity.

"People like you and me just aren't fated to have children, Bobby."

He understood all too well her taunt that he was fooling himself to think that having children meant he could ever hope to be a good father. Although he didn't consciously think about it often, since Ally's birth he had lived with the fear that he was no better than his father, that he would fail his own children.

"Well don't count me out yet," he replied.

He hoped he had managed to keep his face from showing that she had scored a hit. He revealed to her the documentation of first the birth of her daughter, and then her death. He hammered her about the abuse she suffered as a child, then about her jealousy of her own daughter. As he described how the little girl's father might have stroked her hair and she might have placed "little baby kisses on his eyelids", he thought about Ally doing that very thing when she was three years old. Nicole's rage at him drove her to return to the vulnerability that she had first discovered in Bobby.

"Who helped you concoct this theory, your mother?"

"In her wildest delusions she never spawned anything like you, Nicole."

He left the room then as her lawyer brought in her release papers. He overheard her furiously telling the lawyer to get Ella released as well, to do whatever was necessary to keep Bobby away from "my girl." He was glad that Annie and the children were in Connecticut, but couldn't squelch the worry about Nicole using them to strike back at him. Ron Carver was able to pull some strings and arrange for the local police to send a squad car to sit outside Grandpa's house, as they had just over a year earlier.

The autopsy report from Australia of an unidentified child showed just how depraved Nicole was, with the broken arm and neck testifying to Nicole's rage against her own daughter. It gave Bobby and Alex the leverage they hoped would turn Ella against her as they confronted her the next day with the information. As he and Alex sat in the surveillance van that night, they heard Nicole find the small microphone they had hidden in Ella's pocket, and the sounds of the two women struggling. Running up the narrow metal stairs of the warehouse, Bobby's foot slipped on one of the steps and he went down hard on his right knee. With Alex and the uniformed officers behind him, and adrenaline pounding in his ears, he barely registered the "pop" and the pain that flashed through his knee. He pulled himself up and continued up the stairs at a dead run. They found a broken window, signs of a struggle, and a lot of blood.

By the time he got home late that night, his right knee was swollen and painful. He wrapped an ace bandage around it, elevated it on pillows, and put ice packs on it. He hoped it would resolve itself within a few days. His camping trip with the twins was just over a week away and he didn't want anything to interfere.

The next day Ella's body was retrieved from the water and Dr. Rodgers concluded Nicole had killed her before she even entered the water. She also concluded that the amount of Nicole's blood that was found made it unlikely she would have been able to survive any length of time in the water. Bobby's suspicion that Nicole had set the whole thing up and faked her own death nagged at him. But nevertheless he called Annie and told her it was safe to come home.

Almost before he could catch his breath, he and Alex were off to a new case. The kidnapping of a famous atheist and her granddaughter, and the subsequent murder of the grandmother, made this a high profile case that the mayor insisted go to Major Case. He managed to get home before the children went to bed, but knew that this case was going to involve long hours if they were to make any progress before his weekend fishing trip.

As he hugged and kissed his wife and his children, Bobby kept silent about his knee. He knew that his nurse wife would immediately call the doctor to schedule an appointment, who he suspected would recommend he cancel the fishing trip. With Nicole's taunt that he wasn't meant to have children still fresh in his mind, he was determined not to disappoint his sons. He decided that if his knee didn't improve by the time he returned from his weekend with the boys, he would go see the doctor. In the meantime, he needed to keep Annie from seeing his swollen knee or knowing that he was in pain.

He dressed for bed in the bathroom, slipping on sweat pants to cover his bandaged knee. He joined Annie in bed and told her all the details of the investigation of Nicole, his interview with her, what they had found at the scene, and Dr. Rodger's conclusions. But he also explained his theory of how Nicole might have faked her death. Annie listened quietly, facing him in the bed with her hand resting on his chest.

When he finished, she didn't say anything. She leaned forward and kissed him, gently at first, then deepening the kiss and moving closer to him. He reveled in the taste of her and the feel of her against him. But he realized that making love to her would mean undressing, and Annie would see his knee. Reluctantly he pulled away, swung his legs over the side of the bed, and sat up. He didn't look at her as he stood, finally turning to her as he reached the door.

"I…I'm sorry, Babe. I need to do some research on this case Eames and I caught today."

"What?"

He watched the emotions flicker across her always expressive face. Surprise, followed by disappointment, then confusion, and finally hurt as she realized he did not intend to make love to her that night. He resisted the urge to return to bed and erase that look, to make it right.

"I need to spend as much time as I can on this case so that I don't leave Eames in the lurch next weekend."

He waited for her to respond, but she simply stared silently at him. Concentrating on not showing any signs of a limp, Bobby turned away and walked out of the room.

**End chapter 1**

13


	2. Chapter 2

**TREMORS **

**CHAPTER 2**

_Thank you spook, for your beta services. And thanks to everyone I've bounced ideas off of about camping, seven year old boys, insights into Bobby, and knee injuries. _

Bobby sighed and surreptitiously rubbed his right knee under his desk. In the four days since he fell on it, the swelling and pain had lessened. But his knee felt unstable, as though it were about to "give out". This caused him to be a little more tentative when walking, especially up and down stairs. Worse than the pain was the tension between him and Annie. He had been sleeping in the basement to avoid having sex with her, knowing that if she saw his knee she would insist that he go to the doctor. He told her every night that he had to "work on the case", which was a half-truth. But he also told her that he fell asleep on the couch in the basement because he was working so late.

She didn't believe him, he could see that. She had never been able to hide her emotions and after twelve years of marriage, he knew what she was thinking before she spoke. She was confused and hurt. More than that, he could see that she was afraid to ask what was wrong. There had been so many arguments lately that she was afraid to know why he was avoiding her. He sighed again. He also knew that he had been irritable and had snapped at her and the kids more than once. The fatigue and pain were wearing on him.

He had been irritable with Eames as well, but she had no fear of asking him what the hell was wrong with him. He told her he was tired from the case and from preparing for the fishing trip. It didn't really satisfy her, but she let it go. She knew he was trying to tie up this case before the weekend, and so was putting in long hours. He knew that if she suspected he was in pain, she would call Annie right away.

Bobby kept telling himself that once the weekend was over he would explain everything to Annie. He would go to the doctor and take care of his knee. He knew she would be upset that he kept this from her, but at least she would know that it wasn't because of any problem in their marriage. He hoped she would understand.

"There's nothing more we can do tonight. Are you going home?"

He looked across the two desks at his partner. "Yeah…yeah, I'll be leaving soon. Are you leaving?"

"Yes. Tom's working, but I'm going to meet him near the station house for dinner."

"OK. See you in the morning."

Alex stepped into the elevator and pushed the button for the first floor. She was glad she was alone as she didn't feel like making small talk with her coworkers. There was something going on with her partner and she didn't like it. Actually, there was something going on with her partner and his wife. She had realized that when she and Annie went to the gym together one day. She and Annie had an unspoken agreement that neither of them was allowed to complain about Bobby, but she could see from her demeanor that whatever was bothering Bobby was bothering his wife as well. Alex suspected it had something to do with Nicole Wallace, since Bobby had been particularly distant and uncommunicative since her disappearance.

She allowed herself to worry over whatever was going on with Bobby and Annie as she drove to the diner where she was meeting Tom. Before walking into the diner she told herself that she was done thinking about her partner and his problems, she was going to concentrate on someone who seemed to be slowly but surely becoming quite important to her. She entered the diner and smiled as the object of her affection stood up. His 6'2" muscular frame, short blond hair, and hazel eyes never failed to cause her heart rate to speed up just a bit. Today was no exception.

He leaned down to give her a quick kiss before she slid into the booth. As they ate and talked, he frequently reached across the table to intertwine his fingers with hers. He knew she wasn't particularly fond of public expressions of affection, so he was careful not to overstep. Somehow knowing that he wanted to kiss her deeply and passionately, to sit next to her and run his hand up and down her spine as they talked, to walk down the street with his arm around her, and yet he restrained himself for her comfort—it just made him even more attractive to her. And in private she always made sure he knew just how much she appreciated his efforts.

Tom launched into a story about the report he had been helping his son with for school. He and his ex-wife shared custody, both agreeing to live within the school district so there would be as little disruption in the children's lives as possible. Alex liked that Tom was so involved with his children. It was one more characteristic that made him attractive to her. They had been dating for almost five months and she found herself drawn to him more and more as time went on. But they were trying to take things slowly. Although Tom had been present when Alex babysat her nephew at her apartment, she had not yet introduced him to the rest of her family. He told her all about his son and his daughter, but so far had not suggested she meet them. This was fine with Alex. For now they were just exploring being with one another. The rest would come eventually if this became a serious relationship. She settled into her seat and firmly pushed the last lingering thought about Bobby and Annie from her mind and gave her complete attention to the big fireman sitting across from her.

"Phillip, go tell Daddy that dinner is ready, please."

"OK," Phillip said as he ran towards the basement door. He returned quickly, but it was a few minutes before Bobby appeared in the kitchen.

She watched him during dinner. He was quiet and distracted, as he seemed to be all the time lately. However, he did answer Phillip's and Andrew's questions about their upcoming fishing trip. The boys were excited, both about the fishing itself, and about having a "guys' weekend" with their father. Ally was just as excited about the "girls' weekend" she and her mother had planned. Once he had begun planning the fishing trip, Bobby had surprised Annie and Ally with tickets ("for my girls") to a Broadway play, "Fiddler on the Roof". Annie was not sure how well ten year old Ally would be able to sit through a three hour musical or how well she would understand the themes presented, but Ally was excited beyond words.

After dinner the children helped clear the table and then were sent upstairs to take their baths. Bobby and Annie finished cleaning the kitchen. As he loaded the dishwasher and she wiped the counters, she tried to engage him in conversation.

"How is work?" she asked.

"Fine."

She waited a moment, but he didn't add anything to his one-word answer.

"Do you think you'll be able to close this case by the end of the week?"

"I hope so."

She tried again. "Do you have any suspects?"

"What difference does it make who did it? I would think that one less atheist is something to celebrate."

Annie was stunned and couldn't answer for a moment. It wasn't like Bobby to be cruel and she almost felt like he had slapped her. He looked back at her with an unreadable expression.

Finally in a soft voice she said, "That was incredibly mean, Bobby. If you don't want to talk, then just tell me."

She turned and, with as much dignity as she could muster, walked out of the kitchen. She stayed upstairs the rest of the evening. After the children were in bed she went to her bathroom to change, intending to read in bed for a while. When she came out of the bathroom, she found Bobby in the bedroom.

"Babe, I'm sorry. You were right; that was incredibly mean and I….I don't know….I've been…." He stopped and looked at her for a moment. "I'm sorry."

Annie crossed the room to him and put her arms around his waist. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. They stood still for several moments and then Annie reached up to kiss his throat. He found her mouth and kissed her deeply. But when she slipped her hands under his shirt, he pulled away.

"I…uh…I need to….do some more research." He kissed her again. "I'll be up later."

Bobby and Alex were able to close the kidnapping/murder case by the end of the week, so Bobby and the boys would leave on Friday after school. Bobby's knee was only slightly swollen and not as painful; he was sure it would heal without any problem, but decided it was still best not to mention it to Annie. He hoped by the time he returned home on Sunday it would be fine and he could stop hiding it from her. He was in the garage setting out all the equipment they would be taking with them so that he could load it into the SUV quickly the next day. The children were in bed, although he suspected the boys were still awake and whispering about the weekend. Annie came into the garage and asked if she could help him.

"No thanks, Babe. I'll be done soon."

"Well," she said with a smile as she put her arms around him and leaned against him suggestively, "if I help you then it will go even quicker. And then I can give you a…proper goodbye."

Bobby kissed the top of her head and pulled away reluctantly. "I..uh…have some…work…I need to catch up on before I leave. I'll probably be up late. You should go ahead and go to bed."

"Bobby…." Annie trailed off, not knowing what to say.

Bobby picked up a sleeping bag and unrolled it to check for rips. Annie stood watching him for a moment, then turned without saying anything and went back into the house. She felt tears stinging her eyes, but struggled to hold them back until she could reach her room. She closed the bedroom door, went into the bathroom and closed and locked the door. She pulled her clothes off and got into the shower, turning the water on full blast, as hot as she could stand it. Standing in the pounding, hot water she finally allowed the tears that she had been holding back since returning from Connecticut to flow.

She had tried to believe Bobby's excuses about needing to work and about falling asleep on the couch. But they had not made love since she and the children had come home. In fact, Bobby had not even slept in the bed with her. He had fallen asleep on his couch every night. It was obvious that he simply did not want to make love to her. Now she allowed her imagination to consider why. With every new possibility that occurred to her fresh sobs shook her, until she couldn't cry any more and couldn't bear to think of any more reasons. She got out of the shower and wrapped a large fluffy towel around her. She went into the bedroom to get her pajamas, but as soon as she saw the bed she was suddenly so exhausted that she couldn't even think about which drawer held the pajamas. She climbed into the bed with just the towel around her, pulled the covers up over her, and almost immediately fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Bobby came up to the room later and saw her asleep. He stood looking at her for a moment. He could tell that she had been crying and fresh guilt stabbed his heart. When she turned over, the covers fell down to her waist and he realized she was naked. He wanted nothing more than to climb into bed and feel her against him, to make love to her. But he gave a frustrated sigh and left the bedroom to go back downstairs.

Bobby left work early the next day and had the SUV packed by the time the children got home from school. As he directed two very excited boys to kiss Mommy goodbye and get into their seats, he knelt down to hug and kiss Ally. He straightened and looked at Annie. She had spoken little to him all day, only responding when he spoke directly to her. He moved to stand in front of her. Still she said nothing, simply looking up at him.

"We'll see you Sunday," he said softly.

She nodded. "Sunday. Have fun."

He hesitated a moment, then pulled her roughly into his arms and held her tightly. He spoke softly with his mouth close to her ear. "I love you. I'm sorry about this whole last week, Babe. We'll talk when I get home. OK?"

She fought back the tears that suddenly formed and silently nodded her head, hugging him back. He pulled away and kissed her until the children started giggling. Annie and Ally stood in the driveway and watched them drive away.

"Well, Miss Ally. I guess the official 'Girls Weekend' has begun."

Bobby, Phillip, and Andrew arrived at their destination and had their camp set up shortly before sundown. Bobby took them on a short hike to explore the area and then they returned to camp to cook dinner, roasting hot dogs over the fire. After eating dinner and cleaning up, Bobby sent the boys into the tent to change into their pajamas. They sat around the campfire, warming themselves in the chilly mountain air. Annie had strictly forbidden telling ghost stories, so Bobby read to them. He sent them to bed and sat by the fire listening to them whisper and laugh until they finally fell asleep. He tried to read, but found himself staring into the fire and thinking about Annie.

He rubbed his forehead, remembering the hurt and confusion that seemed to be a constant on her face lately. He knew that his explanation for his behavior was going to raise more issues. She would be angry with him for not telling her about his knee, she would be angry with him for not seeing a doctor, and she would probably be angry with him for going ahead with this camping trip. He hoped once she calmed down and was reassured that his knee was fine, that she would understand. Bobby sighed as he put out the campfire and went to the tent. He lay in his sleeping bag listening to the even breathing of the boys and the night sounds of the woods, finally drifting off to sleep.

He had no trouble waking the boys up early; they were excited to get started fishing. After breakfast, Bobby packed lunches and water for all three of them. Gathering their fishing gear, they headed for the river, just a short hike from camp. They found a wide, shallow area that dropped off into deeper water. Bobby showed them the limits of how far out they could wade and gave them a refresher course in water and river safety.

He had been teaching them to fish almost since they could walk and now they didn't need very much instruction. But this was the first time the three of them had gone alone. In the past, Annie had been there to take them for hikes or insist they lay down for naps when they got bored, leaving Bobby to spend hours in the river, alone with his thoughts. They had never spent an entire day fishing and Bobby was prepared to stop fishing when they became restless. However, Phillip and Andrew each caught a fish early and that fueled their enthusiasm. Their interest did not waver all morning.

Bobby was pleasantly surprised at his usually active twins' ability to focus on fishing for such a long period. Even their conversation mellowed into long discussions of various friends and schoolmates, their admiration for their very pretty teacher, and questions about Bobby's childhood and his work in the Army. Bobby smiled to himself as he realized that he was not on edge watching the boys to make sure they didn't get into trouble, but that he was genuinely enjoying their company.

They saw a few other fishermen along the river, but they were spread out far enough that, other than greeting one another, they didn't interact very much. Likewise, there were other campsites near theirs; they could hear them, but none were in sight of their camp.

At lunchtime Phillip and Andrew were torn between wanting to continue fishing and wanting to assuage their hunger pangs. Bobby settled it for them, insisting they come out of the water and sit down to eat. As they sat and munched the sandwiches that Bobby had packed, both boys were quiet. They listened to the sounds of the water and the birds singing and fluttering in the tree tops over them. The boys' eyes widened at the sight of deer stepping daintily through the brush and trees nearby; a doe with two fawns. Bobby smiled with pride at their restraint in remaining silent in spite of their excitement. After the deer had disappeared as quietly as they had appeared they cleaned up their lunch. Bobby asked if they wanted to go for a hike or go back to camp and relax, but both boys insisted on going back to fishing.

The afternoon passed much as the morning had. Despite vigorous objections from Phillip and Andrew, Bobby insisted that they stop well before the sun went down. Although they had much more enthusiasm for catching fish than for cleaning them, they pitched in and helped without too many complaints. He made sure to take a lot of pictures of the proud fishermen with their catches. Bobby had brought food to prepare for dinner but they had caught enough fish to enjoy the fruits of their labors, frying the fish in a pan over the open fire. He helped them to clean up the best they could for bed. While in their pajamas, they roasted marshmallows and made s'mores for dessert. Bobby smiled as he licked a softened glob of chocolate squeezing out from between the graham crackers, thinking how much his chocolate-loving wife would enjoy this.

Sitting around the fire, he again read to the boys before bed. But they were very tired and he saw that they were having trouble keeping their eyes open. He sent them off to their sleeping bags and tonight there was very little whispering and laughing before the two exhausted boys dropped off to sleep.

Once they were asleep, Bobby rolled his right pant leg up and removed the ace bandage that he had wrapped around his knee. He had almost decided to go without it that morning because the swelling was almost gone and it wasn't hurting. But he had wrapped it anyway and now he was glad that he did. All of the walking up and down hills, over uneven ground, and picking his way over the rocks in the river had left his knee somewhat swollen and painful. He rubbed it and then wrapped the ace bandage around it again. He opened the first aid kit and took some ibuprofen tablets before crawling into his sleeping bag and falling into a restless sleep.

Rested and revived, Phillip and Andrew were awake before Bobby the next morning. His knee seemed less swollen this morning and only a little sore. He found Phillip and Andrew dressed and anxious to get back to the river. Bobby made breakfast and laughed at the boys as they gobbled their food, barely chewing.

"You guys know that we won't be able to fish all day, right? We have to pack up and head back home this afternoon."

"We know, Daddy," said Andrew.

"That's why we want to go _now_, please?" added Phillip.

"OK, Buddy, we'll go." Bobby smiled at their enthusiasm.

Once more they headed down to the river, to "their spot." Bobby waved to two men down river from them; their names were Tim and Gene. They were camped closest to them and had stopped by the evening before and listened good-naturedly to Phillip and Andrew as they told all about the fish they had caught. The morning passed as pleasantly as the day before. As lunchtime neared, Bobby warned the boys that they would have to quit soon. After lunch they would pack up their camp and load the car. Reluctant to leave, the boys kept begging to stay "just a little longer".

"OK, guys. Thirty minutes and then we're done. Understood?"

"OK, Daddy," they said in unison.

A few minutes later, Bobby had walked out into the river several feet further than the boys. His back was to them as he concentrated on casting his line, when he heard Andrew yell excitedly.

"Daddy! Daddy! Look what I caught! Look how big it is!"

As Bobby shifted his weight onto his right leg and turned to look behind him, he suddenly felt his knee buckle. Before there was time to register in his brain that he was falling, he found himself almost immersed in the cold water. His knee was crushed between the weight of his body and the rocks on the shallow bottom of the river. With the roar of the river, he felt rather than heard a "pop" from his knee. Excruciating pain shot through him, radiating from the outside and back of his knee. He heard the groan that involuntarily burst from him. When he tried to push himself up, he found that any weight or pressure on his right knee sent more sharp pain coursing through him.

"Daddy?" Through the fog of pain, he heard the twins' voices. He looked up and saw them standing nearby with worried expressions, fishing forgotten. He pulled his left foot under him and shifted his weight. Trying to keep all his weight on his arms and left leg, he tried again to stand. He began to move to an upright position, but lost his balance and fell back into the water, jarring his knee again. He leaned forward on his hands, his head down, trying to catch his breath. He looked up again at the two sets of worried brown eyes watching him, trying to work out how to get himself onto his feet and out of the river. He heard shouting and looked down river to see the Tim and Gene running towards him.

"Hey, are you hurt?" Bobby nodded his head wordlessly. The men hooked their arms under each of Bobby's and lifted him up. With their support he managed to hop to the shore, keeping the weight off his knee. They lowered him to a rock and squatted next to him. Phillip and Andrew stood nearby, quiet and solemn.

"Where's it hurt?" Gene asked. Bobby, still unable to form words, pointed to his right knee. Gene rolled his pant leg up as gently as possible. The ace bandage that Bobby had wrapped around it was tight now, and his knee was swollen more than it had been the night he fell on the stairs.

"Well, I'm no doctor, but that looks bad," said Tim. "Maybe one of us should go to the ranger station to call for an ambulance."

Bobby shook his head. He had seen Phillip's and Andrew's eyes grow bigger with fear at the mention of an ambulance.

"Guys," he said, finally able to speak. "Can you gather up our equipment? My pole is still in the water, right over there. Go get it for me before it floats away, OK?"

They hesitated a moment, then went to rescue his pole and gather all of their gear.

"No ambulance," Bobby told the men. "I think if I rest a few minutes, I'll be able to make it to camp. We'll pack up and go home." Both men began to protest and Bobby told them, "I'll call my doctor as soon as I get home. In fact, my wife is an ER nurse. If she thinks I need to go to the emergency room, I will. It'll be OK."

"You can't drive with that leg like that," said Gene.

"I'll manage. It'll be OK," he repeated.

Finally Bobby convinced them, but they insisted on helping him back to camp. While he rested and tried to collect himself, he sent the boys to look for a thick, sturdy branch. Andrew found one that looked strong enough to support Bobby's weight, and with the help of the two men he got back to camp. After crawling into the tent and changing into dry clothing, the boys also changed into dry clothes. He found another ace bandage in the first aid kit. He removed the wet bandage and rewrapped his knee. Tim and Gene insisted that he sit with his leg propped on a rock while they helped Phillip and Andrew break camp and load everything into the SUV. They half carried him to the SUV and helped him in. He could see they were worried that he was making a mistake and tried to reassure them that he would be fine. He shook hands with them and thanked them for their help. Phillip and Andrew were quiet as they climbed into the back seat and buckled their seat belts.

The drive home seemed to take forever. He took some more ibuprofen before leaving, but it wasn't helping. His knee throbbed with every movement of either stepping on the gas pedal or brake. Finally he turned onto their street and their house came into view. The Mustang was not in the driveway as he pulled in; Annie and Ally were not home. Turning off the engine, Bobby turned slightly so that he could see both boys.

"Look guys, I want to thank you for helping me out so much. I really had a good time with you this weekend….until the end, anyway. I…uh….I just want to ask you a favor, OK?"

"What Daddy?"

"I…I want to tell Mommy about my knee myself, OK? Just don't….don't say anything when she gets home….not until I can talk to her and tell her what happened. Can you do that for me please?"

"Yes Daddy," said Phillip.

"I won't tell her," added Andrew.

"Thank you guys. Now, let's get unloaded." He pushed the button on the garage door opener and the door slid open. The boys got out and began carrying items into the garage. Bobby used his make-shift cane and hobbled into the house, carrying the duffle bag containing his and the boys' clothing.

Once in the house, he deposited the duffle bag in the laundry room. On his way back to the front door to supervise the unloading of the gear and help if possible, he heard the Mustang drive up. He paused by the sofa and listened to Annie greeting the boys. He knew he had to tell her what happened as soon as possible, so he gripped his stick and headed towards the door. The partially opened front door suddenly burst open as a golden ball of fur streaked through it and towards him. He barely had time to register that Sandy was launching her body towards him in ecstatic greeting. She hit him in the middle of his chest and the stick clattered to the ground. Bobby lost his balance and grabbed blindly for something to break his fall. His hand flailed out and knocked a lamp off an end table. He felt fresh pain stab his right knee as he crashed to the floor with Sandy on top of him.

**End Chapter 2**

12


	3. Chapter 3

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 3**

_Thank you to my beta, Spook!_

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,  
Make me a match,  
Find me a find,  
catch me a catch  
Matchmaker, Matchmaker  
Look through your book,  
And make me a perfect match

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,  
I'll bring the veil,  
You bring the groom,  
Slender and pale.  
Bring me a ring for I'm longing to be,  
The envy of all I see.

Annie and Ally sang the words lustily, filling the car with their voices. Sandy sat complacently in the back seat, next to Ally. Her fur was growing out and she looked a little less like a lion these days. Annie glanced in the rear view mirror at her daughter. She had not been sure that Ally would find "Fiddler on the Roof" interesting enough to sit through three hours of it, even with the excitement of seeing a Broadway musical. But the ten year old was spellbound from the moment the curtain went up. They had been singing the songs from the musical over and over.

Lunch in the city, a little window shopping, and a matinee Broadway musical had made for a perfect "girl's weekend." They sat in Annie's and Bobby's bed, eating pizza and ice cream. They stayed up late watching movies and playing card games. Annie decided they should go pick up Chinese food for dinner, picking up enough for "the boys". It would be ready to be warmed up if they came back late.

"Mommy!" Ally's excited voice caused Sandy's ears to perk up. Ally was bouncing in her seat and pointing as their house came into view. "They're home! They're home!"

Annie pulled the Mustang into the driveway next to the SUV. She didn't see Bobby, but Phillip and Andrew were struggling to carry the heavy tent into the garage. As she emerged from the car, the two boys ran to hug her. Ally and Sandy tumbled out of the back seat. Phillip and Andrew were excitedly telling them about the fish they caught. Sandy was dancing around them barking.

"Where's Daddy?" Ally asked.

"He went in the house. We're unloading the car," Phillip answered.

Annie looked at the tent they had been trying to drag into the garage. "Well, that tent is pretty heavy. Why don't you wait for Daddy to help you?"

"Because he….umm….we….we just want to help," Andrew stammered.

Sandy, either hearing or smelling some evidence that Annie couldn't detect, suddenly realized her master was in the house and headed that direction at a dead run. She pushed through the partially open door as Annie frowned at Andrew's nervous answer.

"I know Daddy appreciates your help, but dragging the tent on the ground might rip it. Just wait for Da….."

She broke off at the sound of a crash from the house, followed by Bobby's yell. Annie ran to the house. As she entered, she caught a glimpse of a broken lamp on the floor. But her attention was focused on her husband sprawled on his back, his face grimacing in pain. Sandy was standing over him, barking frantically.

"Bobby!" Annie rushed to kneel next to him. The children ran in behind her.

"Daddy!" Ally ran to Bobby. All three children were talking at once and Sandy continued barking.

"Quiet!" Annie ordered. "Sandy, sit!" she ordered. The children fell quiet and Sandy sat obediently, although she quivered with excitement.

"Bobby," she said softly. He hadn't said anything, he hadn't even lifted his head up. "Bobby, are you hurt?"

He nodded his head slightly. As Annie leaned over him, she brushed against his right leg and Bobby groaned in pain. She pulled away quickly.

"Is it your leg?" she asked and reached down to pull his pant leg up. He moaned again as she jostled his leg. When she got the pant leg up to his knee, she saw the ace bandage. She also saw that his knee was extremely swollen.

"What…when…." She faltered, not understanding how he had gotten hurt or how he could have a bandage on his knee.

Bobby was trying to catch his breath and tell Annie what had happened. But the pain was so intense he couldn't speak for a moment. He saw Annie pull her cell phone out and he reached up and grabbed her arm.

"Annie…"

"We didn't say anything, Daddy," Phillip said.

"Say anything about what?" Annie looked at the boys.

Bobby struggled to sit up. Annie put her hand on his chest and pushed him firmly back down. She looked back at the boys.

"What didn't you say anything about, boys?"

"Annie…." Bobby tried again to speak, but Annie frowned at him and put her hand over his mouth.

"Boys?" Phillip and Andrew looked at her sheepishly.

"Daddy fell in the river and hurt his leg," Andrew finally admitted.

Annie's eyes widened and she looked back down at Bobby. "You fell in the river? And you drove home after injuring your leg? What were you thinking?"

She looked at him incredulously. Bobby sighed and pulled her hand away.

"It's my knee," he said faintly.

She looked again at his knee and came to a quick decision. "Ally, I want you to run next door and get Aunt Janey and Uncle Rob."

"But I don't want to leave Daddy!" Ally began to cry. She was kneeling on Bobby's other side. He reached up and gently pulled her to him and hugged her.

"It's OK, Sweetheart. Do what Mommy says and she'll take good care of me. OK?"

Ally sniffed and nodded her head. She got up and ran out the door. Annie opened her cell phone and began to dial. Bobby reached up again and took hold of her arm.

"No ambulance," he said.

Annie pulled her hand away and fixed him with a stern glare while she continued dialing. Janey and Rob ran in with Ally just as Annie finished calling for the ambulance. Annie briefly explained that Bobby was hurt and asked them to watch the children while they went to the hospital. Now all three children were crying. Annie hugged each one of them and reassured them that Daddy would be fine; he just needed to have his knee taken care of. She was worried, however, by how quiet Bobby was. She thought that he must be in even more pain than he was telling her.

The ambulance arrived and the paramedics took the bandage off Bobby's knee so they could examine it. They helped him to stand, but the least pressure caused pain to shoot through his knee. They helped him onto the gurney, over his protests. After reassuring the children that Daddy would be fine, Annie left them with Janey and Rob and followed the ambulance to the hospital. It was not the hospital where she worked, but was closest to their home.

By the time she had parked and made her way inside Bobby was in a room, answering questions from the nurse. After taking his vital signs, she told them that the doctor would be in to see him soon. They waited in silence, Bobby closing his eyes and laying his head back against the bed. The Emergency Room resident came in, looking over the nurse's notes.

Barely looking at Bobby he asked, "So, Mr. Goren, tell me what's going on with your knee?"

Bobby took a deep breath and glanced at Annie for a moment, hesitating before answering. The resident looked up at him in annoyance.

"C'mon Mr. Goren, I have other patients to see," he said. "What happened?"

"Well….uh….about a week ago I slipped and fell on my knee while running up some stairs." Annie frowned in confusion. A week ago? "This weekend I took my sons camping. Earlier today I fell in the river. It felt like my knee gave out. Later on, at home, the dog jumped on me and I lost my balance. But I didn't fall on my knee this time."

"So, was there pain or swelling the first time you fell?"

"Yeah, but it started to get better after a few days."

"What did your doctor say?"

"I…uh…" Bobby hesitated and looked at Annie. "I didn't go to the doctor. The swelling was almost gone yesterday morning, and then it was worse after I had been fishing all day."

"So, you injured your knee and didn't bother to go to the doctor, then you went fishing?"

Still watching Annie's face, Bobby said, "Yeah."

As the doctor began palpating and manipulating Bobby's knee, Annie's thoughts drifted back over the last week. Now she understood why he was sleeping in his office and avoiding intimacy with her. He was hiding his knee injury. But why would he do that? Why wouldn't he tell her? There had been problems between them lately, but were they so bad that he felt he couldn't trust her? Was he still so angry with her over the fiasco at Thanksgiving that he wouldn't confide in her? Had their marriage deteriorated to the point that he felt he had to keep secrets from her? Or instruct her own children to lie to her? Her wounded feelings at being shut out of something this serious were joined now by anger as she remembered Phillip and Andrew trying not to tell her about the accident. Was this what their marriage had come to?

"OK," the resident said, flipping the chart closed. "We'll get some X-rays and get an orthopedic surgeon in here for a consult."

Annie looked over at Bobby. The head of the bed was elevated so that he was reclining. She noted the pallor of his skin, his closed eyes, and clenched jaw. Immediately her anger and hurt were replaced by guilt as she realized how much pain he was in. The resident was about to leave the room when she stopped him.

"Excuse me, Doctor. My husband needs something for the pain."

"Well, the surgeon can order something for him."

"But the surgeon isn't here right now," Annie said.

"I'm sure he'll be down soon," the resident said opening the door.

"Doctor," Annie said firmly, "my husband needs something for pain right now."

"And I told you that the surgeon will give him something. I'm not ordering anything until he's been seen."

"He _has_ been seen," Annie said in frustration. "He has been seen by you. You are a doctor, are you not?"

"Yes I am," the resident was also becoming frustrated. "But as I told…"

Annie cut him off. "He doesn't have a head injury, there is no alteration in consciousness, pain medicine will not affect the X-ray or any other tests. There is no reason not to give him something now."

"I think I'm in a better position to make that decision, Mrs…" he glanced down at the chart, "…Goren. And your husband obviously wasn't in much pain when he ignored this for a week."

"And obviously," Annie was furious now, "_you_ failed to learn in medical school that treatment is based on symptoms and diagnosis, _not_ value judgments about your patients." She took a deep breath and pulled herself to her full height—which still had her looking up at the cocky, young doctor. "I suggest you give the order for pain medication NOW. Otherwise you will find me at the desk _loudly_ demanding to see the chief resident. Or the head of ER. Or the Chief of Staff. Whatever it takes for my husband to get the care he needs."

The doctor looked down at her for a moment, then curtly nodded his head and stalked out of the room. Annie went over to the bed where Bobby was lying with his eyes still closed. She put one hand gently over his where it lay across his stomach. He grasped her hand and squeezed lightly. Annie bent down and leaned her forehead against his temple.

"Hang on, Babe. They'll give you something soon," she whispered.

Bobby nodded and let his head rest against hers. They stayed like that until the nurse came in. Asking again about possible allergies, she administered the pain medicine with an injection in his hip. She told them that Bobby would be taken to X-ray soon and left quietly. Annie stayed where she was, holding Bobby's hand, until she felt him begin to relax as the medicine took effect. Finally, Bobby turned and kissed her on the forehead.

"I thought you didn't talk to doctors like that," he said with chuckle. "I thought you said that unless it puts a patient's life at risk, you will follow a doctor's order even if you disagree."

Annie stood up and grinned at him. "That's true. But today I'm not a nurse. I'm a wife."

Bobby smiled wanly at her and said softly, "Thank you."

He was taken to have his knee X-rayed and soon the orthopedic surgeon came in to see him. Annie decided she liked Dr. Weston. He was short, but powerfully built and had a friendly, easygoing manner. After looking at the X-rays he pulled a stool next to the bed and sat down to ask Bobby once again what had happened. Questioning him on the details over and over, paying particular attention to the position of his knee when he fell each time. Using a needle and syringe, he withdrew some of the blood pooling around the joint. He told him it would relieve some of the pain and make examining his knee easier. Dr. Weston had him place his foot flat on the table, with his knee bent at a 30-degree angle. She saw Bobby wince as the doctor then moved his lower leg forward from the knee to test its stability. He sent him for an MRI of the knee. Finally, Dr. Weston joined them in the exam room again.

"OK," he said, sitting down next to the bed, "you've got a torn ACL. That's the anterior cruciate ligament, the ligament that connects your thighbone to your shinbone and helps stabilize your knee joint. I think that first fall on the stairs caused a mild tear. The swelling and pain diminished with time, but it left your knee unstable, which contributed to the fall in the river today. This one caused a severe tear and seems to have also torn the meniscus, the cartilage between the thighbone and shinbone. If you had gone to the doctor after the first injury, you probably could have avoided surgery. But now I think it's the best option to repair the ACL and the meniscus."

Bobby rubbed his forehead and asked, "So if I have the surgery, how long will it be before I can go back to work?"

Dr. Weston sighed. "Well, the thing is…ACL injuries are pretty common in athletes, especially football and basketball players. Most of them have the surgery and are back playing within six to eight months. We can't even do the surgery for a couple of weeks; we need to get some of that swelling down first. After surgery you will be on crutches from one to three weeks. Normal activities can be resumed at about two to four months following surgery.

"I know that your job doesn't involve daily high-demand activities, like running. But being a cop, you do sometimes find yourself having to…say, run up a flight of stairs, or climb a fence and jump to the other side. Your injury is pretty severe and I can't guarantee that you will recover full mobility and range of motion. What I'm saying, Mr. Goren, is that there is a possibility that you won't be able to return to the NYPD."

Dr. Weston stopped and waited in silence for Bobby to digest this news. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes, trying to picture a life where he was not a cop. Annie was standing next to him and had said nothing while the surgeon explained the injury and surgery to him. Now she reached over and took Bobby's hand.

"So when will you schedule the surgery?" Annie asked.

"I'll go ahead and schedule it in two weeks. But I want you to come to my office in a week so I can see if the swelling is going down. Meanwhile, we will get you a knee brace and crutches. No weight bearing on that knee, stay off of it as much as possible, keep it elevated, ice packs for twenty minutes every two hours while you're awake. And no work…not even light duty. I want you home resting that knee for the next two weeks."

"OK," Bobby said with a sigh. "Two weeks."

Dr. Weston answered Bobby's questions, and left after giving him a prescription for pain and ordering the knee brace and crutches. When Annie finally pulled the SUV into the driveway, it was dark. She helped Bobby into the house and to the couch, propping his right leg up on pillows. She left him to make calls to Eames and to Captain Deakins while she went next door to get the kids. She was grateful to find that they had eaten dinner and were already in their pajamas.

"Janey, I don't know what I would do without you," Annie told her friend.

"Oh stop. You've done your share of babysitting for my guys," Janey said.

On the walk home, Annie told the children that Daddy had hurt his knee and they could not climb or jump on him. Sandy had been left in the backyard and now Annie let her in to join Bobby and the children in the living room. As she made sandwiches for herself and Bobby, she listened to him patiently answering the children's questions about his knee. He asked Ally about the "Girl's Weekend" and she regaled him with stories about the play, singing some of the songs. Annie brought the food into the living room; sandwiches and cut-up raw vegetables for herself and Bobby, cookies and milk for the children.

Because Annie wouldn't allow Bobby to try to maneuver the stairs, the children snuggled around him on the couch while he read to them. They said their prayers and then Annie herded them upstairs and tucked them all in bed. Taking clean sweatpants and a tee-shirt for Bobby and pajamas for herself, she went back downstairs. She helped him to the downstairs bathroom, remove his knee brace, and into the shower. She got in with him to support him and make sure he didn't put any weight on his right leg. He made a few half-hearted, joking passes at her but she could see that he was in pain and so hurried him out of the shower and back to the couch.

She gave him the pain medicine, propped his leg up again, and put an ice pack on his swollen knee. The pain had abated by the time she removed the ice pack and Bobby drifted to sleep. Annie set the alarm on her cell phone for two hours, curled up in a chair, and tried to get some sleep. She kept it up throughout the night; every two hours she got up, checked to see if he needed pain medicine, put an ice pack on his knee for twenty minutes, then reset the alarm and tried to get a little sleep.

The pain woke Bobby. He opened his eyes and glanced around the dark living room. The clock on the VCR glowed, showing him it was just before 4:00 AM. A movement caught his eye and he looked down to see Annie on the floor beside him, her legs curled under her, her head resting on top of her folded arms next to him on the couch. Her eyes were closed and he smiled, knowing she had fallen asleep while praying. _Praying for me,_ he thought. He was tempted to run his fingers over her face, but he could see that she was exhausted from getting up with him every two hours. Bobby saw the bottle of pain pills on the coffee table behind where Annie was sitting. Quietly, trying not to awaken her, he reached for the bottle. The alarm on Annie's cell phone sounded and she opened her eyes and sat up.

Seeing what he was reaching for she asked, "Are you hurting Babe?"

"Yeah," he said, pulling his hand back.

Annie handed him the bottle while she got up and went to the kitchen for another ice pack. She sat on the coffee table and held his hand until the pain medicine took effect. She returned the ice pack to the freezer and reset the alarm on her cell phone.

"Annie, can we talk?"

She looked down at him for a moment, and then gently brushed her hand across his forehead.

"No, you should go back to sleep."

"Annie, please."

She got up and walked across the room. "It's about a week past time to talk, isn't it, Bobby?"

"Yes…..yes it is."

"You didn't tell me," she said softly, turning to face him.

"No I didn't." Bobby waited for her to continue.

"Is that why you wouldn't…" She hesitated. "Why you've been sleeping in your office?"

"Yes. I didn't want you to see my knee."

She rubbed her forehead and fought back tears. "I know you don't talk to me about your mother anymore. But you and I…I thought…we were…We've never had secrets before. Is this what…" She was afraid to ask the question, afraid of the answer. "You didn't just not tell me…you hid this from me. You deceived me." Her voice broke as she added, "And then you told my own children to lie to me."

"Annie." The grief on her face broke his heart. Struggling to prop himself up without moving his leg he reached over and patted the coffee table. "Please come over here and let me explain." She hesitated and he repeated, "Please."

Annie moved to sit on the coffee table and Bobby lay back against the pillows. He reached for her hand and was gratified when she didn't pull away.

"First of all, I didn't tell the boys to lie; I swear I didn't, Babe. I shouldn't have said anything to them and it's my fault if they thought I wanted them to lie. It's just that…well, you know how they blurt out everything they know. I just wanted a chance to tell you myself and I asked them not to say anything until I talked to you. I'm sorry."

She kept her head down, staring at their hands entwined and resting on her lap. She absently began tracing the fingers of her free hand over his knuckles as she took a deep, shaky breath and nodded. Bobby also took a deep breath as he continued.

"I didn't tell you when I hurt my knee the first time because I knew that you would insist on taking me to the doctor. And I knew that most likely you and the doctor would then insist that I cancel the camping trip this weekend. And I just couldn't do that. It started to feel better after a couple of days and I thought maybe it would be OK. If it wasn't better by Monday, I was planning to tell you and go to the doctor. But then, I fell again today and…well, you know the rest."

"The camping trip? This is all about the camping trip?" He nodded. "Bobby, that's ridiculous! Of course I would have made you see the doctor. Of course I would have told you to cancel the trip."

"It was important to the boys."

"_You_ are important to the boys. They would have understood."

"Don't you get it, Annie? I don't want them to have to understand broken promises."

"Like you did?" Annie moved to sit next to Bobby on the couch. "Bobby, you are nothing like your father. What will it take for you to believe that?"

He sighed. "Nicole said something the last time I questioned her."

"Nicole…of course. Why am I not surprised? What did she say?"

"She said that maybe people like her and I weren't meant to have children."

"You and Nicole? Bobby, you are nothing like your father and you are certainly nothing like Nicole!" She kept holding Bobby's hand and laid her other hand on his chest. "You have a wife and three children who adore you and think you are Superman. Yet this serial killer, who murdered her own child, has the power to make you doubt what you and the people who know you best know to be true."

He put his hand over hers. "In a way, I think Nicole understands a part of me that you won't even admit exists."

Annie pulled her hands away and placed them on either side of his head. She leaned her forehead against his and closed her eyes.

"Robert Goren, what am I going to do with you?"

He took her face between his hands and looked her in the eye.

"Forgive me?"

Annie smiled. "Always, Babe, always."

He smiled back at her and kissed her. He traced his thumb under one eye. "You're exhausted," he said. "Turn off the alarm and go to bed. It won't hurt my knee to go a little longer between ice packs."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "The more we do this now, the faster the swelling will go down. But I promise that tonight I'll sleep. And let you sleep."

"Well then, at least lay down here with me, OK?"

Annie smiled and nodded. "OK." She lay next to him on the couch and snuggled against him, her cheek against his chest and her head tucked under his chin. Almost immediately her breathing deepened and slowed as she fell fast asleep. Once he was sure that she was sound asleep, Bobby carefully reached over to the coffee table, picked up her cell phone, and shut off the alarm. Wrapping his arms tightly around her, he kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes.

**End Chapter 3**

13


	4. Chapter 4

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 4**

_This chapter will be taking us on a little side-trip with SVU and Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson. It is based on a case that my sister worked as a detective, although I am taking liberties with the story. You will see how Annie fits into it by the end of the chapter, and next chapter will bring Bobby in. _

_Thank you as always to my beta, Spook._

"How's your partner doing?"

Alex Eames and Tom Spencer were having dinner at Sal's. Bobby's enthusiasm for the Veal Parmigiana had convinced her to give the place a try, and it was now one of her favorite restaurants. She sighed and smiled across the table at her handsome date.

"He's bored out of his mind, and probably driving his wife crazy. He's always had a lot of nervous energy, but it's hard to pace when you're on crutches. I finally took pity on him and took some case files over there for him to dissect. And I'm glad I did, he had some good insights."

"When is he having surgery?"

"Monday. Then it'll probably be another two months, at least, before he can come back to work. And he may have to be on desk duty for a while."

"If he is able to come back…" Tom said gently.

Alex fixed him with a steely stare. "Bobby will be back."

Tom smiled at her and held his hands up in mock surrender. "OK, OK, Goren will be back. And how is your temporary partner doing?"

"Barek? She's good…if you can get past the talking to herself thing," Alex laughed. "She is really good, though. She's done a lot of research on profiling….not as deeply into it as Goren, but a lot. I'm glad the captain gave her a shot at Major Case, even if it is temporary. I think she'd make a good addition to the squad. Enough about my adventures with partners….let's talk about you. Tomorrow's your day to pick up your kids, right?"

"Right." Tom said, suddenly nervous. "I…uh…I actually wanted to talk to you about that."

"Talk about what," Alex asked.

"My kids, and this weekend. I was wondering if you would like to meet them? Maybe go to the zoo with us?" Tom watched her closely for her reaction.

"Meet your children?" Alex saw the nervous way he was looking at her and realized this was an important step for him. Meeting his children seemed like an important step for her, too. Was she ready for it? She put her hand on top of his where it lay on the table and smiled at him. "Are you going to pick me up or are we going to meet there?"

*******************************************************************

Annie, curled up on the love seat in the bedroom, looked up from her book. Bobby was sleeping and she hoped he stayed that way for a while longer. In the week since his surgery the enforced confinement had only gotten harder for him. And for her. For the two weeks before his surgery, she thought that he might go crazy. He had finally gotten the hang of going up and down the stairs with crutches, so he spent a good deal of time in his basement office. Annie was grateful for that. Access to his computer and his books had eased his boredom, as had the case files that Alex brought to him for consultation. Annie continued to work, deciding it would be better to take time off when he actually had the surgery. She had already requested a week off in July, and now she requested the week before it as well. Allie's eleventh birthday rolled around and they celebrated with a small party at a pizza parlor.

She went back to reading her book. The day before she had taken the children to camp. This week was to have been time for Bobby and Annie to get away together while the children were at summer camp. But Bobby wasn't ready for traveling. He wasn't able to get into the Mustang at all yet, and even the SUV was uncomfortable. The longest period of time he had been in the SUV since the injury was the day before the surgery when Annie drove him and the children to Carmel Ridge to visit his mother. He had talked to her on the phone every day, but she was becoming increasingly angry and insistent on seeing him. He finally asked Annie to drive him to Carmel Ridge and she had, against her better judgment. She was afraid the long drive would be painful for him and that the time with his mother might be upsetting to him. She was correct that he was in pain by the time they reached the psychiatric facility. Bobby and the children went in to visit and Annie spent the afternoon exploring the shops in a nearby mall, since Frances still refused to see her. She didn't know if she had been correct about the visit upsetting Bobby, since he said nothing about it, other than it was "fine". The children talked about drawing pictures with Grandma, reading with her, and taking a walk with her. But they didn't say anything about what Grandma and Daddy talked about and Annie didn't ask. She was concerned that the children already felt torn in this protracted estrangement and she didn't want to put them in the position of spying on their father and grandmother to assuage her own curiosity.

It was early morning and unusual that Annie was awake before Bobby. His surgery had gone well. An outpatient procedure, he had gone home later that same afternoon. He still needed pain medicine and was sleeping more than usual, but his physical therapy was going well. She heard him stirring as he awakened and got up to check on him.

"Good morning, Babe," she said, leaning down to kiss his forehead.

"Morning," he replied gruffly.

"Do you need pain medicine?"

"I can get it myself, if I need it," he said irritably.

Bobby sat up and ran a hand through his hair. He got up and went into the bathroom. Annie smoothed out the sheets and blankets while he was gone. When he returned she asked, "Do you want breakfast now? I'll go make something for you."

"I'm not hungry."

She sighed and climbed onto the bed next to him. Still sitting on the side of the bed, Bobby noticed a stack of books and case files on the table next to the bed.

"Did you stack these?" He turned to look at her.

"Yes. You fell asleep with them spread out over the bed, so I stacked them up when I came to bed."

"I had them arranged; I was researching something. Now I don't know where anything was," he said accusingly.

Annie refused to be daunted by his bad mood. "It's all still there, Bobby. I just stacked them up. You know, so I could get in the bed too."

He scowled at her for a moment as she looked back serenely. Bobby reached for the bottle of pain pills on the table and took one. Then he stretched out on the bed and put one arm over his eyes. Annie lay quietly next to him for a few minutes.

"You should eat some food with the medicine. I'll get you some breakfast, OK?"

"I said I'm not hungry."

"You are very grumpy this morning," she said rolling onto her side to face him.

He ignored her. Annie sighed and got up off the bed. She went to the bathroom and closed the door. Several minutes later, when she emerged from the bathroom Bobby was still lying with his arm over his eyes.

"It's time for your bed bath, Mr. Goren."

He sighed gustily and said, "Annie, I'm not in the mood….just let me…."

He broke off as he looked up to find Annie standing next to the bed, wearing a nursing cap and a white teddy that plunged down in front, revealing her cleavage. She was holding a towel in one hand and the other hand was placed seductively on her hip. They hadn't made love since he injured his knee and the sight of her in the sexy lingerie and the playful stance dispelled his gloomy moody. A smile spread across his face and he began to chuckle.

"Well, Nurse, as tempting at that offer is, I'm afraid that my….uh….my _mobility_…..is somewhat…restricted."

Annie smiled and sat on the edge of the bed, leaning across to rest one hand on the other side of his body. She brought her face close to his, her mouth a breath away from his and said softly, "Oh really? Now I was thinking that what we really need to do…." she sat up and reached into the drawer in the table next to the bed, "is to restrict your mobility even more." She lifted her hand to reveal Bobby's handcuffs dangling from one finger.

His breath caught in his throat as he looked from the handcuff's to her smiling face. His deep laugh rumbled in his chest and he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. His mouth found hers for a long, searing kiss.

******************************************************************

Olivia Benson knocked on the door of the small house. Her partner, Elliot Stabler, was standing behind her. Behind him were two uniformed officers. Olivia and Elliot were detectives with the elite Special Victims Unit and had the bad luck to be on call on this night. The door was opened by a woman of about fifty. Olivia and Elliot both held their badges out for her perusal.

"I'm Detective Benson," Olivia told her, "and this is Detective Stabler. Are you," she looked down at her notepad, "Mrs. Lightner? Did you call to report some children left alone?"

The woman nodded and stepped back to let them in. They followed her inside. The house was small, the furnishings old and shabby, but it was clean and tidy. She led them to the living room; her husband stood up and turned off the TV when they entered.

After introducing themselves, Elliot said, "Why don't you tell us about these children?"

"Well, there's four of them. The mother—her name is Mary—she leaves them alone a lot. But as far as we can tell, she hasn't been home since yesterday afternoon. And she hasn't been home yet tonight, so we thought we better tell someone." Mr. Lightner explained. His wife nodded in agreement.

Olivia asked, "And you're sure that there isn't an adult with the children? Maybe she has a babysitter?"

Mrs. Lightner shook her head. "No, there's never anyone there but her and the kids, except sometimes when she brings a man home. But she don't ever have a babysitter. Anytime she leaves, those kids are all alone."

"Do you know how old they are?"

Mrs. Lightner scratched her head. "We don't see much of the kids, but best I can tell the oldest isn't any more than about six, and the baby must be around eight or nine months now…they're all real small."

"How many children are there?"

"Four."

"Four?! And the oldest is only six?" Elliot looked at them in surprise. Mrs. Lightner nodded and her husband shrugged.

"OK," Elliot said, "can you show us which house they live in?"

"Oh, they live here," said the man.

"Here?! In your house?" Olivia and Elliot exchanged glances.

"Well, yeah." Mrs. Lightner looked at them with annoyance. "That's what I told them when I called in. We turned our basement into a studio apartment a few years ago and we rent it out."

Now Elliot's annoyance was showing. "You rented a studio apartment to a woman with four kids?"

"It's big," Mr. Lightner said defensively. "And she needed a place to stay. We were doing her a favor. As long as she paid the rent on time we didn't care how many kids she had. But she didn't pay last month and she hasn't paid this month, so I told her yesterday that if she didn't pay by today she was gonna have to move out. We can't afford to support her and her kids."

Olivia was angry now, and she could see her partner was struggling to control his temper as he said, "So let me get this straight. This call you made tonight…it's because you want us to _evict_ this woman without you having to go to the trouble of filing papers and going to court to do it. Is that about right?"

"Uh, well…no…um…I…I mean, it's true she hasn't been home. We…uh…we were just…doing our…uh….our…." the man stammered, trying to find the right word.

"Our civic duty," his wife supplied.

"Yeah," he said, more sure of himself now. "We were doing our civic duty."

Olivia shook her head. "And if we take the kids into custody, then you can just lock the mother out and not go through the legal hassle of having her evicted," she said with disgust. "Fine, you've done your 'civic duty'. Just show us where the children are."

"The door to the basement is in the kitchen." The woman, nervous now, showed them into the kitchen.

Elliot turned to the couple in disbelief. "There's a padlock on the door. You locked her out while her kids are in there?"

"No! We didn't put that lock on there, she did. Mary locks it every time she leaves." The fury in Elliot's face caused the man to take a step backwards. "I…I think she locks because she thinks we'll go through her things when she's gone."

The uniformed officers had said nothing since entering the house, but Olivia could see the disgust on their faces as they stood back and let the detectives handle this couple. More worrisome to her was the dangerous look on her partner's face. She moved to stand next to him and placed her hand on his arm, hoping he would hold onto his temper. Of all the horror they routinely saw in their jobs, the abuse of children was the hardest for Elliot to deal with. She let some of her own anger creep into her voice as she spoke to the Lightners.

"Mary put this lock on the door? And you don't have a key to it?" They both shook their heads wordlessly. "So those kids have been down there alone for over twenty-four hours and you haven't seen them?" Again they shook their heads in the negative. "And you waited until tonight to call the police?"

"Well, the oldest girl…I mean she's young, but she seems to take care of the others. So we didn't worry too much when Mary didn't come back last night." Mrs. Lightner told them.

"Do you have bolt cutters in your squad car?" Elliot looked at the officers. One of them nodded and turned to go to the car. Elliot looked back at the couple, not bothering to hide his revulsion. "Is this the first time she's been gone this long?"

"Well, no…"

"So," Elliot continued in a deceptively quiet voice, "you've seen these four little children left alone before, but as long as the mother paid you on time you didn't bother to do anything about it?"

Neither of them answered. The silence seemed interminable as they waited for the officer to return with the bolt cutters. Once she did, she cut the lock off and opened the door to the basement. Olivia noted that it was dark as they went down the stairs; the large room was lit only by the ambient light of the television. The television also supplied the only sound. Olivia hoped the silence meant the children were asleep. She didn't want to think what other reasons could explain why four children were so quiet with strangers coming into their home. Not wanting to startle them with the glare of the overhead light, Elliot located a lamp and turned it on.

They were not asleep. Seated on the fold-out bed of a sofa were three small children. They were all facing the television, but turned now to look up at the people invading their small home. None of them cried or spoke, they simply looked up at the adults.

Olivia glanced around the large room. There was a small kitchenette along one end, a large closet along the other end. The only furnishings were the TV, the couch, one large chair, and a large dresser next to the closet. There seemed to be layers of dust and grime everywhere and the dirty carpet had obviously not been vacuumed in weeks, perhaps months. Dirty clothes were lying on the floor. The stench of dirty diapers and mildew was almost overpowering. But there were supposed to be four children. Olivia looked for a crib but there was none. Where was the baby?

Elliot moved to kneel in front of the little girl who seemed to be the oldest. The girl and her two brothers were all very blond, with blue eyes and fair skin. Elliot was concerned that they were not just fair-skinned, but that they had a very unhealthy pallor. They were dirty, as were the pajamas they were all wearing. He smiled at the girl and held out his badge as he gently spoke to her.

"Hi there. My name is Elliot and I'm a police officer. This is Olivia and those two officers are Johna and Harlana. What's your name, Honey?"

"Judy," she said softly as she smiled back at him and reached for his badge. She held it in her hands, running her fingers over it and looking at it with wonder.

"How old are you, Judy?"

"Eight." Elliot and Olivia exchanged surprised looks. Her small, thin frame looked more like a six year old.

"What are your brothers' names?"

"Sammy and Mikey."

Olivia knelt next to her partner and asked the little girl, "Judy, do you have another brother or sister? A baby?"

The girl nodded solemnly and said, "Yes, Susie."

"Where is Susie, Honey?"

Judy turned and pointed to the head of the bed, where it met the back of the sofa. "I couldn't get her out."

Elliot got up and scrutinized the bed. A chill went through him as he saw a small hand jutting above the mattress. "Oh my God, Liv! She's caught between the frame and the sofa!"

They quickly but gently moved the children from the bed to sit on the floor, and they pulled the mattress off the bed. They found the baby lying sideways and wedged firmly between the frame and the cushioned back of the sofa. She looked up at Elliot with big eyes, but did not cry. He slipped his hand between the frame and the sofa, wondering how she had gotten in there. The cushion had very little give to it and he had difficulty just getting his hand and arm in there. He tried to get his arm underneath her to push her up from below, but she was lodged too tightly and didn't move. Two more units arrived and police filled the room.

It took an hour to finally extricate the baby from the sofa. In all that time, she never cried or even whimpered; she simply lay quietly watching the people trying to get her out. The three older children sat where they had been placed and watched somberly. Officers Johna and Harlana sat on the floor with them, talking to them softly. Judy told them that Sammy was six years old and Mikey was three. She wasn't sure about Susie, but did remember that she was born around Halloween, which would put her age around nine months.

Mikey was wearing pull-up diapers that were saturated with urine and stool. Harlana searched the room and finally found, in a dresser drawer, one pull-up diaper and two smaller diapers for the baby. Meanwhile, Johna had searched and found a washcloth that seemed relatively clean. She rinsed it out in the sink and they changed Mikey's diaper. His skin was red and excoriated where it had been in contact with feces for a long period of time. However, they could not find any cream to put on it and so simply put the clean diaper on for the time being.

The room was brightly lit with the overhead light now. Once they freed Susie, Elliot and Olivia were able to take a good look at the children. The baby's diaper was just as saturated as Mikey's had been and Johna changed it, noting that she, too, had severe diaper rash. They were all small for their ages, thin, undernourished. Elliot, thinking of his own noisy and rambunctious children, found it disturbing that these children were so quiet and passive. They didn't cry, didn't seem afraid of all the strangers, didn't ask for their mother, and didn't even ask questions. They quietly and shyly answered direct questions, although Mikey's vocabulary was limited. A cursory examination revealed that they had head lice and scabies, a fact that caused most of the uniformed officers to shift uncomfortably. When Olivia stated they needed to take them to the emergency room to be checked, all of the officers but Johna and Harlana refused to meet her gaze.

"Oh for crying out loud," Harlana said with disgust. "What a bunch of wimps! We'll take them all in our car. We'll put Judy up front and I'll sit in the back with the other three."

"Thanks, Officer," Olivia said, sparing her own look of disgust at the others. "Why don't you take two of them and El and I will take two?"

As they brought the children up the stairs into the kitchen, the Lightners were trying to get a look at the basement. Elliot firmly closed the door behind him and told them not to go down there or touch anything until it had been cleared by the police. He had one of the officers put yellow tape across the door, gave his card to Mr. Lightner, and ordered them to call if Mary showed up. Olivia got in the back seat of the car with Susie and Judy, while Elliot drove. Harlana climbed into the back seat of their squad car with the two little boys and her partner drove. It was after midnight when they headed for the emergency room.

******************************************************************

Annie sighed and took a drink of soda. It was only midnight and she dreaded the long night. Since Bobby had been off work with his knee injury, she had been picking up extra shifts when she could. But she hated the night shift the most. She couldn't adjust to the night time hours and it was difficult to stay awake, especially on slow nights like this. She looked at the clock again, but it seemed to be moving more and more slowly. Most of the other doctors and nurses who were on duty were in the break room, playing cards. She had joined in for a while, but was too tired to concentrate, so she got up to get a soda and wander around trying to stay awake.

She looked up as she heard the doors open and saw Elliot Stabler, Olivia Benson, Officers Johna Jones and Harlana Simmons entering with four small, and very dirty, children. She was familiar with the detectives, having worked with them when a rape victim was brought to the ER. She also knew Johna and Harlana from times they had been to the hospital.

"Well, what have we here?" She smiled at the children, who shyly returned her smile.

"Mom disappeared and left the kids alone, locked up in a studio apartment in the basement of a house. We need to get them checked by a doctor before Children's Services takes over."

Annie realized that her quiet night, and her struggle to stay awake, had just ended. She nodded and led the entourage back to a room, telling the receptionist to get the resident. She took them to a large exam room.

Dr. Scott came in, took one look at them, and said, "I can't examine them like that. Get them cleaned up first and I'll be back."

Annie sighed and turned to exchange looks with the officers.

Olivia said, "Elliot and I will stay and help. You two can go ahead and get back to your patrol."

Annie had been examining the children and now she said, "Wait a minute before you go, girls." She rummaged around in a drawer, and then handed some bottles to the two officers. "You may not have been in contact with them long enough to get them, but this is shampoo for lice and this is lotion for scabies. You will probably want to use those when you get home in the morning. Just don't tell anyone I gave these to you, OK? I just don't want you to have to wait and go to your own doctors."

They both rolled their eyes and thanked her as they took the medicine. Elliot told them to put out Mary's description to other units and to keep an eye out for her.

"Oh, don't worry about that," Johna said. "I can't tell you how much we want to find that….woman."

After they left, Annie turned to look at the children again. She smiled at the detectives as she said, "Well, let's get to work."

**End chapter 4**

12


	5. Chapter 5

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 5**

_Thank you, Spook!_

Mike Logan stepped out of the shower and dried off. Wrapping the towel around his waist, he stood in front of the mirror and spread shaving cream over his five o'clock shadow. It had been a while since he had needed to shave in the evening. _Since Valentine's Day to be exact,_ he thought wryly. Five months since he had last been on a date with Sarah. Five months since he had been on a date. He tried to remember the last time he had gone that long without a date. Only once, long ago. After the relationship that he thought would last "until death do us part" had ended.

It was another dark-haired, dark-eyed woman who had stolen his heart back then, and who had broken his heart when she left. He hadn't dated for a year back then, and when he did he threw himself headlong into it, going out with almost every beautiful woman within his sphere. He enjoyed women and they enjoyed him. In the beginning he had rarely dated a woman more than two or three times. He wouldn't have articulated it, or even admitted it to himself, but he needed to guard his heart. Later, he had several "semi-long-term" relationships; none made it past six months, few made it that long. Still he guarded his heart, unwilling to expose himself to the kind of pain he experienced when she left.

Until Sarah. Even now he smiled as he remembered her long, dark hair, her laughing eyes, and the way it took his breath away every time she blushed. And that made him shake his head at his own foolishness as he wiped remains of the shaving cream from his face. What had been so special about her? What was it that caused images of her laughing to invade his thoughts while he was at a crime scene? What was it that triggered the need to make up excuses to go into the city so that he could take her to lunch? What was it that produced a desire to mine the depths of her thoughts, desires, secret joys and pain?

They only dated for four months. They had now been apart longer than they were together. Which was part of the reason he decided to introduce himself to Gina that day on the ferry. He had seen her several times and finally decided it was time to put thoughts of Sarah behind him. He enjoyed talking to Gina that day, and the next, and the next. She was a nurse in a prison, so she understood about the kind of people he came into contact with on a daily basis. She was studying to be a paramedic and Mike admired her determination. Tonight would be their first date.

******************************************************************

"Mommy, look!" Jia Li squealed with delight as she squeezed the bath toy and it squirted water all over her mother's face.

"Jia Li, stop that!" Sarah Johnson laughed at her daughter as she tried to finish bathing the squirming little body. Once she had her out of the tub and wrapped in a thick towel, she hugged her and kissed her wet cheek. She dried her off and helped her dress in "Little Mermaid" pajamas. Once Jia Li was settled and in bed, Sarah read to her until she fell asleep. Going to her own bedroom, she stopped and looked at herself in the full-length mirror on the bathroom door. She sighed as she smoothed her hands over her body, lamenting the weight she had put on in the years since she graduated from college.

Sarah had received a phone call last week from Jerry, an old friend of hers and Tony's. He moved to California after college and she had lost track of him, although he sent flowers and a very nice card when Tony died. Jerry recently moved back to New York and had called to talk about old times. They talked for two hours and Sarah enjoyed laughing with someone who had known her when she was young and in love. Jerry finally asked if she would go to dinner with him and she agreed. But now, with the date looming the next night, she was nervous and wondered if she had made a mistake.

She hadn't dated since she and Mike agreed to stop seeing one another. The thought of Mike caused a little stab of regret. She wondered what he was doing, if he was dating anyone. She shook her head and mentally ordered herself to get over it. She and Mike weren't star-crossed lovers; they had only dated briefly. _Time to move on, Sarah,_ she told herself firmly. She sighed as she opened her closet door to pick out a dress for tomorrow night's date.

******************************************************************

"What are you doing here this time of night? We always see you during the day," Olivia said as Annie began collecting supplies and called for two orderlies.

"I'm just picking up some extra shifts since my husband's knee surgery."

"Oh yeah," said Elliot. "I heard that Goren messed up his knee. How is he?"

"Oh, he's recovering nicely from the surgery. But being cooped up is driving him crazy. And me along with him," Annie laughed. "He can't even drive yet, so he's pretty much a prisoner at home unless I take him somewhere."

Elliot and Olivia laughed with her. Annie sent the orderlies off to the Obstetric and Pediatric departments to gather plastic bathtubs, bathing supplies, and patient gowns and pants for the children. She also had them bring back extra pairs of scrubs for herself and the detectives as she thought they would probably need to change clothes before they were done.

Elliot bathed Sammie and Olivia bathed Judy. They were able to get more information from them about their mother and about how they lived. The children were starving for attention and eager to talk about anything the adults wanted. Annie bathed first Mikey and then Susie. As she bathed them, she talked to them in a gentle tone and sang songs that her children had enjoyed when they were small.

Mikey's eyes never left Annie's face as she bathed him. She was able to elicit a laugh or coax him to say a few words, but for the most part he simply stared at her in fascination. When she had finished with him and dressed him in the pajamas from Pediatrics, he sat on the counter next to her as she bathed the baby. Susie responded very little to Annie's songs or talk. She lay passively, not splashing the water as Annie's children had at that age. Annie was not able to elicit even a small smile from the baby; she simply stared solemnly at Annie.

After the children were bathed and lotion applied for the scabies, they were dressed in clean clothes. The doctor came in to examine them and pronounced them reasonably healthy, although small for their ages. Annie sent orderlies for formula for the baby, and milk and cereal for the older other three. The three of them settled in with the children; Olivia gave Susie a bottle, while Annie fed Mikey, and Elliot helped Judy and Sammie. Mikey's vocabulary was limited and Annie tried to teach him several words, including her name, "Aaannnee."

Olivia was finally able to reach a Child Welfare Services social worker; she reported Children's Services would be unable to pick the kids up until morning, so Annie had cribs for Susie and Mikey and pediatric beds for Judy and Sammie brought in. She also had an orderly bring children's books down from Pediatrics. Susie dropped off to sleep immediately. Olivia and Elliot left, saying they would be in early to check on them. Annie sat in a rocking chair and read the books, with Mikey snuggled in her lap and Judy and Sammie listening from their beds. Mikey fell asleep in her lap and she gently placed him in the crib.

Annie stayed with the kids until morning, leaving the other nurses to cover the ER. Mikey woke up crying a few times, but settled down when Annie sang to him. Judy woke up early, before the others. Although Annie felt it was not her job to elicit information from the children and was careful not to ask any questions, Judy seemed to want to talk about Mommy and Mommy's boyfriends.

"Mommy said I'm a big girl and I'm in charge of the little ones when she isn't there," she confided. It seemed that Judy was in charge a lot. "I tried to feed them, but sometimes the food ran out before Mommy came home."

"What school do you go to," Annie asked. Judy told her she had never been to school, and couldn't read or write her name. Annie thought about her own children; how she and Bobby had read to them constantly when they were babies and toddlers; how they had learned to write their names, the alphabet, and simple words before they started school, not because their parents pushed them to learn but because they had learned to love books and reading and couldn't wait to learn. She hugged the little girl who had never been given a chance to have a childhood.

"Mikey misses Mommy the most when she's gone. He wakes up at night crying for her. I just hug him and tell him she'll be back soon. Susie doesn't cry, hardly ever."

The others began to wake up, and Annie had some breakfast brought in. Judy was right; Susie never cried once, although she eagerly took the bottle when Annie fed her. Mikey wouldn't let Annie out of his sight. He followed her around the room and held onto her pant leg. He tried to repeat words, and discovered that "Aaaaneee" was one word that got a smile from her each time he said it. It was time for Annie to go home, but she called Bobby to tell him she needed to stay over for a while. He told her that the children were ready for school and were eating their breakfast. He was still unable to drive, so Janey would be taking them to school. He assured her that she could take as long as she needed.

Elliot and Olivia returned and introduced her to the social worker, Lily Sherman. They told her that the mother was in custody; it would be up to DA whether to bring charges. Annie told them what Judy had shared with her, and then asked what would happen to them. Lily said that they would try to keep kids together. The only thing available right then was an emergency shelter; she would try to find a foster home for all four as soon as possible.

"I want to take them in," Annie said impulsively.

"Well, it's hard for foster parents who work to take in so many children," the social worker said. "And with babies, we prefer that one parent be at home."

Annie thought for moment, looking down at Mikey still clinging to her leg and the other three children with Olivia and Elliot.

"My husband is off work right now because of a knee injury."

Lily shook her head sympathetically. "I know you want to help these children, Annie. But how can your husband take care of a baby with an injured knee?"

"He should be off the crutches soon, and Susie is so small; I doubt that it would hurt his knee to pick her up. Once he's ready to go back to work, I can take a leave of absence and stay home with them."

"Look," Lily said with a sigh. "This isn't a decision you should make hastily. Why don't you talk to your husband? If the two of you think this is something you want to do, give me a call and we can start the paperwork. It takes about a month to process."

"No, they are already comfortable with me and they are going to be scared if you warehouse them in that emergency shelter. You can do an emergency placement with us, can't you? Until our paperwork is processed? I mean, my husband is a detective with the NYPD, and I'm a nurse…can't you rush the paperwork?"

The woman looked at Annie for a moment and then took out her card and wrote an address on the back. "This is where I will be taking the children. If your husband agrees, meet me there today at eleven. We will let your husband and the kids get to know one another and I'll explain the regulations and get the paperwork started."

Annie smiled gratefully at her and took the card. She knelt down to tell the children goodbye. Mikey wrapped his arms around her neck and began crying mournfully. Annie hugged him tightly and told him that she would come to see them in just a little while. But Mikey just held onto her tighter and finally Elliot had to gently pry him away from her. Listening to his wails grow fainter as they left the hospital, she thought her heart might shatter.

She rushed home and arrived after Janey had picked the kids up for school. Bobby was in the kitchen, cleaning the breakfast dishes. She went in and hugged him tightly, feeling the comfort of his strong arms around her and his chest against her cheek. Bobby didn't say anything, he simply held her. Finally she looked up at him. He smiled down at her, his dark brown eyes full of tenderness, before lowering his head to kiss her.

"Bobby, will you go somewhere with me this morning?"

"Sure, where are we going?"

Annie averted her gaze. "Will you go with me without knowing the answer to that question?"

Bobby put a finger under her chin and tilted her head back so she was looking into his eyes. He kissed her again.

"Anywhere, Babe," he said softly.

"Thank you," she said, squeezing her arms more tightly around his waist.

"Especially if you want to take me upstairs," he said, grinning at her.

Annie laughed and pulled away. "Maybe later; right now I need to get a quick shower and change my clothes."

"Need some help?"

"Somehow I think that if you help, it won't be quick."

"No, but I'll make it worth your time."

"Stop! I really need to get showered and changed. We are meeting someone at eleven."

Bobby frowned slightly. "You've been working all night. Shouldn't you get some sleep?"

"Later," she said. "I don't work tonight or tomorrow, so I'll catch up on my sleep later."

After showering and changing cloths, Annie helped Bobby into the SUV and drove to the address that the social worker had given her. She saw Bobby's curiosity when they pulled up in front of the big house; but he didn't ask any questions, waiting patiently for her to explain what they were doing there. Inside the house, she introduced him to Lily Sherman. Lily led them to a large play room that was used for family visits; she told them to make themselves comfortable and she would be back in a few minutes. Annie helped Bobby to get settled on the couch. He looked questioningly at her. Taking a deep breath, Annie began to tell him the story.

"Last night, Detectives Benson and Stabler brought four children in to the ER. They had found them alone in a basement apartment. The mother had left them alone and evidently is in the habit of doing that. They are all small and underweight for their ages. The oldest one is eight and has never been to school. The youngest is around nine or ten months. They found her wedged in a sofa bed and she still has welts on her stomach. They stayed in the ER all night. We bathed them and fed them, and I took care of them until the detectives showed up with the social worker this morning. The mother has been arrested and now the kids are going into foster care."

"Poor kids," he said softly. "But what does that have to do with us being here right now?"

Annie lowered her gaze. "They are such sweet children. I….I just wanted you to meet them."

Bobby frowned and tilted his head to the side, trying to make eye contact with her.

"What are you up to, Annie?"

She was saved from answering when the doors opened and Lily came in carrying Susie, the other three children in her wake. When Mikey saw Annie, he immediately ran towards her, launching himself onto her lap before she could get up from the couch. He wrapped his arms around her neck and sobbed. Lily brought the other three children over and introduced them to Bobby. He held out his hands for Susie, situating her on his lap. Once Mikey had calmed down, Annie introduced him as well.

Sammy climbed onto the couch between Bobby and Annie while Judy sat next to Annie, peeking over shyly at the big man holding Susie. Annie asked Judy to bring her some of the books in the bookcase and she began reading to them. Before long, Judy had migrated over to sit next to Bobby. Annie set the books down and they just talked with the children. With his gentle questioning, Judy and Sammy, in guileless manner, were eager to tell Bobby all about their home, their mother, and her many boyfriends. There seemed to be no reason to suspect that any of them had been molested, nor had their mother ever hit them or been otherwise physically abusive. But her neglect of them, both physically and emotionally, was more than evident. Mikey did not say any words, but he too responded to Bobby by smiling shyly at him from the safety of Annie's lap.

In the next room, watching through the two-way mirror on the wall, Lily took notes of all the details that Judy and Sammy revealed. She shook her head in wonder. Rather than being frightened of the big man, the children had opened up to him and told him more than they had told herself or her trained staff members. She was even more surprised as she watched him interact with the baby. Rather than speaking to her in a sing-song baby voice, he sat her on his lap so that she was facing him and spoke to her in soft, gentle tones, as though she were a small adult. Susie watched him solemnly, as she did all adults. But Lily saw a smile light up her face for one brief moment as she looked up at Bobby. It was gone as quickly as it had appeared, but it was the only emotion the baby had revealed since the detectives first found her stuck in the sofa bed.

She instructed the other staff that the room was in use and not to interrupt Bobby and Annie with the children. At lunchtime, she took lunch in for them all and Bobby and Annie ate with the children. Mikey refused to leave Annie's lap. After lunch, Judy and Sammy colored pictures at the table, and Mikey fell asleep in Annie's lap. After she ate a few bites of finger foods, Bobby fed a bottle to Susie and she, too, fell asleep. They sat for a while, holding the sleeping babies and watching the older children as they colored. Staff members came in and took the sleeping children so they could put them to bed. Bobby and Annie told Judy and Sammy goodbye as they also went off to take naps. Lily asked them to come to her office.

"Well," she said after they were all seated. "I have the paperwork all ready for you to fill out and I think that I can get an emergency placement while we wait for it the paperwork to make its way through the maze of red tape."

"What paperwork?" Bobby looked at Annie, who once again averted her eyes. "Annie, what is going on?"

"Oh," Lily stammered, "I thought you had talked about this. I thought that's why you were here today." She sighed and got up from her desk. "I'll just leave you two alone to discuss this. Let me know what you decide."

She left the room. In the deafening silence that followed, Annie flushed under Bobby's scrutiny. He waited for her to explain.

"OK," she said finally. "I told Lily that I want us to be foster parents for the kids. I wanted to you to meet them before I asked you. I knew that you would fall in love with them just like I did." Bobby didn't answer right away and she leaned forward earnestly. "Babe," she said pleadingly, "those kids have been so neglected…I think you and I would be so good for them. You saw how sweet they are…it would be so easy to love them, don't you think?"

"Of course it would be easy to love them. But there's more to it than that, Annie. Four more children in the house would be a lot to adjust to, both for us and for our own kids. We don't even have room for them."

"I've already thought about that," Annie said eagerly. "We can put a crib for Susie in our room. Judy can share Ally's room. And we can partition off part of the basement and turn it into a bedroom for Sammy and Mikey; or for Phillip and Andrew, and we'll put Sammy and Mikey upstairs in the twins' room."

"Annie, it's not just the space issue. These kids are so young. You remember how hard it was for both us to work when the twins were babies and Ally was little. And we don't even know when, or if, I'll be able to go back to work. If I can't go back to the NYPD, then we'll have some decisions to make. And you are talking about trying to make those decisions with seven children depending on us."

"For now you are home. When you go back to work, wherever that is, then I can take a leave of absence until Susie is a little older."

Bobby rubbed his forehead. "Seven children and one paycheck? The expense of remodeling the basement? Annie…"

Annie knelt on the floor in front of him. "I know it won't be easy, but we can do it, Bobby. We can give these children the stable home they've never had, parents who love them. Please, Bobby."

He wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb. "We can't do it, Babe."

"They need me…us."

"And you need to be needed, don't you," he asked softly.

"What?" Annie got up from the floor.

"You need to be needed," he repeated. "You like having someone to take care of. My mother filled that role for the last twelve years, but suddenly there's a hole in your life and you want to fill it with four very needy children."

She stared down at him. He unflinchingly returned her gaze. "You think that I…" A knock on the door cut her off. Lily opened the door and entered the office and sat down at her desk.

"Have you come to a decision?"

Annie sat back down in her chair and quietly asked, "What if we wanted to adopt them?" She didn't look to see how Bobby reacted.

Lily shook her head. "You're getting too far ahead. We don't even know yet if the mother will spend time in jail, or if we will be able to put this family back together."

"You would send them back to their mother?!" Anne was incredulous. "After all that she's done? How could you even consider that?"

"Annie, reunification is always our goal. Sometimes that doesn't work out, and occasionally the children are put up for adoption. But for now we have to assume that placement will be temporary, until the mother takes the necessary steps to have her children returned." She looked from Bobby to Annie. "Are you interested in _temporarily_ fostering these children?"

Bobby didn't answer; he watched Annie with an unreadable expression. Tears threatened to spill over as Annie looked at him and then back to the social worker.

"No," she said finally. "I'm sorry. We…we've decided that with our own three, the size of our house, and my husband's injury, taking on four more children right now just...just isn't going to work."

Lily sighed. "You know, you should have told me that before you came here and spent time with them. Mikey was already attached to you after last night and today you just reinforced it."

Annie nodded her head and looked down. "I…I know, and I'm sorry. It's my fault. I didn't tell my husband why we were coming here. I thought if he met them first, then….well, it was foolish and I'm sorry." Annie glanced at Lily and then at Bobby. "Could we take just Mikey?"

Lily shook her head. "No, Annie. We need to keep them together. After everything they've been through, it would be too traumatic to split them up. I've got a couple of foster homes that may be able to take four kids."

Bobby and Annie got up to leave. At the door, Annie turned to Lily.

"Mikey will be upset if I'm not here when he wakes up. Can I tell him goodbye?"

"It's better if you don't. The longer we prolong this, the harder it's going to be on him." She patted Annie's arm sympathetically. "He's going to be alright. I'll find a good foster home for them."

As they were leaving, they met Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler on their way in to check on the children. They stopped to talk, asking Bobby about his knee and when he expected to return to work.

Olivia said, "You were talking about taking these kids in this morning, Annie. Did you guys fill out paperwork?"

Annie glanced at Bobby, and then looked down at the ground.

"No," Bobby told them. "As much as we want to, we just can't."

"How many kids do you have," asked Elliot.

"Three," Bobby said.

Elliot nodded. "I've got four. It would be hard to take on four more. Well, we better check on the kids and get back to work. You two take care. Hope you're back on the job soon, Goren."

"Thanks man," Bobby said, shaking his hand. He turned and carefully began making his way down the front steps with his crutches.

Annie was about to follow him when Olivia stopped her. "Annie," she said softly, "I'll stop by the ER now and then and let you know what's happening with the children, OK?"

Annie nodded wordlessly, afraid if she spoke she would start crying. Olivia gave her a quick hug before following her partner into the house. Annie followed Bobby to the car and helped him to get in.

They didn't speak on the drive home. Once in the house, she said she was going to bed. Bobby silently watched her walk up the stairs. She changed into pajamas and climbed into the bed. She was exhausted after working all night, staying up for a good part of the day, and the emotions the four sad children had caused to rage within her.

The things that Bobby said swirled in her mind. She knew that he was right; it was foolish to think they could just bring four children home and hope everything worked out. The house was too small for seven children; Bobby's future with the NYPD was in question; and as quickly as Mikey had formed an attachment to her it would be difficult to leave him with a babysitter every day to go to work. Her head knew he was right, but her heart ached for the children who had never known what it was to be loved and taken care of.

"You need to be needed," he had said. Where had that come from? Did he think her only interest in his mother was to fill her own need? After twelve years of marriage, did he really have no idea how much she loved Frances? How could he seem to know her so well and yet not know something so basic and important?

Annie's head was beginning to ache. She went into the bathroom and took something for her headache and got back into bed. She fell asleep remembering Mikey's cries that morning as Elliot carried him from the ER.

She awoke to the aroma of dinner cooking and the sounds of her children laughing. She got out of bed and went downstairs. Bobby was hobbling around the kitchen preparing dinner. Phillip and Andrew were setting the table under the supervision of their very picky sister. All three children were laughing at something Bobby had just told them. She smiled as all three came over to hug her. She took over making the salad while Bobby finished cooking the spaghetti. They didn't speak, but the children's cheerful chatter covered the uncomfortable silence between them.

After dinner the children put their dishes in the sink before heading upstairs to take their baths. She and Bobby finished clearing the table in silence. She was standing at the sink, rinsing the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Bobby lean his crutches against the counter and felt him standing close behind her. He put his hands on the counter on either side of her and leaned his forehead against the back of her head. Annie closed her eyes and leaned back against him. His arms wrapped around her; he kissed her ear gently and rested his cheek against hers. They stood for several minutes in the hushed quiet of the kitchen, with only the thumping of Sandy's tail on the floor as she lay next to the stove watching them.

"Daaaaddeeeee!" Their daughter's voice broke the silence, calling from upstairs. "I need help with my homework!"

She felt him smile and sigh. He kissed her cheek; straightening, he picked up his crutches. "I'll be right there, Ally," he called. Annie turned to face him; he smiled down at her and asked, "Are we OK?"

She reached up and gently brushed her fingers across the stubble on his cheek. "I'm sorry," she said softly. Bobby leaned down and tenderly brushed his lips against hers.

"Daddeeee!"

He smiled at her again and straightened. Annie watched him leave the kitchen. She sighed and turned to wipe down the counters.

**End chapter 5**

13


	6. Chapter 6

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 6**

_This chapter takes place during and after the episodes Want and Magnificat. Thanks again to Spook._

"C'mon, Mike, admit it. You hated that movie, didn't you?" Gina was laughing up at him.

"What can I say? It's a chick flick."

"I guess you like movies where things get blown up?"

"Well…..yeah." He grinned down at her. "Things getting blown up is always entertaining."

As she laughed at him, Mike thought how much he enjoyed the sound…and how rare it was. Only on her days off did she relax enough to tease him and laugh. He suspected there was something going on with her job that was causing her a great deal of stress, but she insisted everything was fine. She blamed her distraction and moodiness on the classes she was taking to become a paramedic.

"OK, Mr. Macho…next time you can pick the movie."

"Great! It ought to be about time for another 'Die Hard' movie."

He heard another laugh that caused him to turn around to search for the source. Sarah was standing about twenty feet away. Her back was to him, but he recognized the dark, wavy hair, pulled back into a pony-tail. She was talking to a man and as he watched she turned, put her arm through his, and they strolled towards him. Sarah caught sight of him and her smile became even brighter.

"Mike! How are you?"

He smiled back at her. "I'm great, Sarah. How are you?"

"I'm good." She turned to the man with her. "Jerry, this is Mike…Mike, Jerry. Jerry's an old college friend of mine."

Mike shook hands with Jerry and introduced Gina. "How is Jia Li?"

"Growing up much too fast," laughed Sarah. "Are you still working on Staten Island?"

"Yeah, I'm still there. That's how Gina and I met…on the ferry."

"That sounds romantic. What do you do, Gina?"

"I'm a nurse in a prison."

"Now that sounds scary."

Gina shrugged. "It has its moments. But they take security very seriously there."

"I hate to interrupt," Jerry said apologetically. "But we have reservations, Sarah."

"Oh, of course. It was nice to meet you, Gina." The two women shook hands, and Sarah extended her hand to Mike. "I'm glad we ran into each other Mike. It's wonderful to see you again."

Mike took her hand and squeezed it lightly. "Yeah…it was good to see you again too, Sarah. Take care of yourself."

He watched them walk away for a moment before turning to Gina. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close.

"So…how bad do you feel about making me sit through that chick flick?"

Gina giggled. "What did you have in mind?"

"How about we go back to your place and order Chinese?"

"Chinese sounds good," she said.

Sarah and Jerry walked to his car and he held the door open for her. He looked over at her as he drove to the restaurant.

"How do you know Mike?"

"We dated for a while," she told him with a smile. "Not for long."

"Did it end badly?"

"No, not badly. It just….ended."

"Was it serious?"

Sarah squirmed in her seat a bit. "What's with all the questions?"

"What's with the evasion?"

"You should mind your own business." She tried to glare at him, but they both ended up laughing.

They had realized quickly after their first date that they were still good friends, but nothing more. She enjoyed the ease of their friendship, knowing there was no pressure for anything more. They went to dinner, to movies, he had taken her and Jia Li to the beach to show off the surfing skills he acquired in California. For Jia Li, he was like having another uncle to read to her and push her on the swings.

"OK, spill. What's up with you and the mystery man?"

"Mystery man?"

"Well, I'm guessing whatever went on with you two, you never brought him home to meet your family. I've been hanging out with you for a couple of months now and no one in your family has mentioned tall, dark, and handsome there."

"Um…no. I didn't introduce Mike to the family."

"What's wrong with him? Did he break your heart? Do I need to go back and kick his butt?"

Sarah laughed. "Bad idea, Jerry. He's a cop, and I've seen him in action."

"Yeah? C'mon, tell me!"

Sarah told him about the night she met Mike; the disastrous blind date, how her drunken companion got physical with her, and how Mike had rescued her.

"We dated for a few months. He was fun and, no, he didn't break my heart. He was never anything but sweet and….gentle."

"So what happened? Why did you stop seeing one another?"

Sarah sighed and looked out the window. "We….just realized….that I wasn't….well, I wasn't ready. It was too soon for me."

Sitting at a red light, Jerry looked over at her contemplatively. "And now? Are you ready to date now?"

She looked back at him and smiled sadly. "I think so. That's why I decided to go out with you."

"But I don't count because we're just friends."

"Well, you counted the first time we went out. I thought there was a possibility of us being more than friends."

"Hmmm...and that was a couple of months ago, yet you haven't gone out with anyone but me. Why?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. No one's asked. And we have fun, don't we?"

"Sure we have fun. But _I've_ been out on dates. And I'm not buying that 'no one's asked' crap. I have a feeling that you are using me as a decoy…so that people think you're dating when you really aren't."

"Well, thanks a lot. It's nice to know that one of my best friends thinks I'm so conniving."

"Oh, I don't think you're doing it on purpose; it's all subconscious, Baby. So, if someone asked, would you go?"

She shrugged again. "I don't know…it would depend on who was asking."

"How about Mike the cop?"

"That's a moot point. Mike and Gina seemed pretty….cozy."

Jerry shook his head. "I don't know…I thought I saw some interest flickering there…for both of you."

Sarah laughed and playfully punched his arm. "You're imagining things. And you are such a _girl_!"

He laughed, pulling up in front of the restaurant. Holding her hand as they walked inside, he leaned close to her and said softly, "I don't think you two are done with each other. But I'll drop it for now….and just wait for my chance to say 'I told you so.' OK?"

Mike lay awake for a long time that night, curled around Gina, listening to her even breathing. Gina was sweet and funny; he liked her a lot. So why was it Sarah's dark eyes and laughter that was keeping him awake?

*****************************************************************

Alex Eames was tired. Not just the physical fatigue that comes with long hours. She was mentally and emotionally exhausted. She had been a cop for a long time, her father was a cop, her husband was a cop. She had been around cops her entire life. So she knew all too well the dangers of letting cases get to you. For the most part, she had been successful in putting up a wall and protecting her emotions. But every once in a while a case came along that got past her defenses.

She was glad to have her partner back at work. Alex had liked working with Carolyn Barek; she was smart and intuitive, if a little odd, talking to herself at times as she mulled over information. But it was good to be working with Bobby again. He had come back only three months after injuring his knee. In a rare moment of candor where her husband was concerned, Annie had confided in Alex that she was worried he was rushing it and going back to work too soon. She had assured Annie that she would keep an eye on him and let her know if he seemed to be in pain. She could see that it bothered him when he was tired, but otherwise he seemed fine.

He hadn't had a chance to ease into the workload; they had caught three overlapping cases immediately after his return. All three were tough and had taken an emotional toll on both of them. The first involved the murder of a woman who worked with the homeless and had led to the discovery of seven homeless men who had also been murdered. They solved the case with the discovery that an auto mechanic was killing the homeless men in a scam to make money for his girlfriend's sick daughter, a daughter who didn't exist. She had been pregnant and unmarried thirty years earlier, but the fetus died in utero and calcified—a "stone baby". Her daughter only existed in her imagination. It left Alex wanting to see her nephew and hold the warm, pudgy baby close to her.

The next case had caused a disagreement with Bobby, though only in private. Ron Carver was furious with Bobby for interfering with his efforts to seek the death penalty for John Tagman. She couldn't understand Bobby's strong feelings that this was not an appropriate death penalty case; Tagman had kidnapped, drugged, and performed a homemade lobotomy on two women. One had died and the other was permanently brain damaged. She agreed with Carver and with Captain Deakins that the horror of what he had done certainly made her want to see Tagman put to death. But while Carver and Deakins both disagreed with Bobby strenuously, she had saved her own comments for him privately—presenting a united front with her partner in public. Bobby got his way in this; Tagman had agreed to a plea deal and would be formally sentenced to life in prison without possibility of parole. She was not looking forward to going to Carver's office to complete paperwork later in the week.

While those two cases, coming so close together, had been difficult, it was the third one that had left her emotionally drained. Doreen Whitlock had tried to kill herself and her four young sons by building a bomb and placing it on their car. The three youngest boys had died instantly, but Doreen and her oldest son, Adam, had survived. Alex would never forget sitting in that hospital room, asking Adam questions. Watching him struggle not to reveal too much, the realization dawning on her and on Bobby that it was his mother Adam was trying to protect, seeing him lie about what his mother told them in the car. "I can't even imagine what her last words to her kids were—before she blew them up," Alex had said to Bobby as they left the room. She understood that Doreen suffered from severe post-partum depression; she understood that her rigid, uncaring husband had intensified her suicidal thoughts; she understood that Doreen wanted her children to die with her so that her husband wouldn't be left to care for them alone. But understanding the facts did nothing to help her understand the reality of a mother killing her own children. Nor could she understand Paul Whitlock's reaction, showing more concern for his reputation than for the loss of his children. Bobby had contacted a lawyer friend of his who specialized in custody cases, in hopes that Adam's grandmother would be able to gain custody. Alex hoped they would be successful, for Adam's sake.

Once again, she had gone to visit her nephew, canceling a date with Tom in hopes that spending time with the baby who had grown in her own womb would somehow help her to make sense of it all. But it hadn't helped. As she drove home she felt just as unsettled. She wanted to talk to someone, but didn't know who. She couldn't talk about something like this with her sister; she had tried for so long to become a mother and Alex knew this would be too distressing for her. Bobby was already home with his wife and children; she didn't want to disrupt their evening. She could talk to her father; he was a cop and he would understand. But her mother had never liked hearing about her cases, always worrying about her daughter in such a "man's" profession.

It occurred to her that this was possibly what she missed most about Joe. He had been a cop as well and they had often talked over cases. With Joe she was able to talk about the horrors she encountered and knew that he would understand. She had often worked through her own feelings about difficult cases by sharing details with her husband. Joe knew what she was going through, and he knew that she didn't need him to solve anything or to make her feel better. He knew she just needed him to listen and understand her feelings.

She pulled up outside her house, but just sat in the car, unable to face going inside and spending the evening alone. Finally she put the car in gear and drove away. A short time later she stopped and again sat in her car, this time looking up at an apartment building. Tom's building. Should she have called first? She had broken their date; would he be happy to see her—or annoyed? There was only one way to find out. She got out of her car and went to the front door. She buzzed his apartment and waited for him to answer.

"Yeah?"

"It's me…Alex."

"Hey! Come on up!"

She heard the buzz as he unlocked the door and she pushed it open. She climbed the first set of stairs and by the time she got to the second floor landing Tom was there, sweeping her into his arms and kissing her deeply. She laughed as she tried to catch her breath, glancing around to see if any of Tom's neighbors were outside watching them. Not caring about her aversion to public displays this time, he pushed her against the wall and caught her face between his hands. He kissed her again and she put her hands on his chest, intending to push him away. But as he moved his lips from hers and began dropping light kisses all over her face, she slid her hands around his waist and pushed herself on tiptoe to get closer to him.

"I missed you," he whispered huskily as he nibbled on her earlobe, sending shivers down her spine. He leaned his forehead against hers and smiled at her. "I thought I was doomed to a boring evening all alone with a pizza and a beer."

"You have pizza?" Now Alex pushed him away and brushed past him as she walked down the hall towards his apartment. "I'm starving. And beer sounds good, too."

Tom sighed dramatically as he followed her. "Upstaged by a pizza….what a blow to my ego!"

Alex turned as Tom closed the door and this time she pushed him against the wall, grabbing his shirt in her fists and pulling him down to her and kissing him. He reached down and grabbed her thighs, lifting her up so that they were face to face. Now it was her hands holding his face and covering him with kisses.

"I have plenty of appetite, Fireman Tom," she whispered.

Tom took in a shuddering breath as she began kissing his throat. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he tightened his grip on her bottom and began to walk towards his bedroom. He paused next to the bed to kiss her again. He pulled his head back and looked into her eyes, half-closed with desire. Suddenly, he unceremoniously dropped her onto the bed, laughing at her squeal. Before she could react, he dropped onto the bed next to her and pulled her into his arms, kissing her as he pulled her shirt up and over her head.

Later, Alex pulled one of his FDNY tee-shirts on and Tom brought the pizza and beer into the bedroom. They sat on the bed as they ate. Tom trailed his fingers across her body as they ate, distracting her, which he clearly enjoyed. After clearing the leftover pizza and empty beer bottles, he stretched out next to her again and pulled her against him. He nuzzled the skin under her ear with his stubble and ran his thumb gently up and down her side. Alex sighed deeply and wiggled to get closer to his warmth.

"Hey," Tom whispered in her ear, "do you want to talk about it?"

She pulled back to look up into his hazel eyes. "Talk about what?"

"Whatever is bothering you. Whatever it was that you broke our date over, and then showed up unannounced anyway." He traced a finger along her jaw and leaned down to kiss her gently. "You can talk to me, Alex. I'm a firefighter. I see some of the same things you see. I'm guessing this mood you've been in has something to do with that woman who blew up her kids. You worked that case, didn't you?"

She stared up at him and for the first time since Joe died, Alex wanted to talk to a man; she wanted to share what went on in her life, every part of her life. She rolled slightly so that she was lying on her back and scooted closer to him. She began to talk, haltingly at first. Tom held her close and didn't interrupt. He let her talk, not asking questions. He knew that it wasn't important for him to understand every detail, only for him to listen to her. She told him about Tagman and the horror of what he had done to those two young women, and about her anger at her partner's inexplicable desire to save Tagman from the death penalty, even as she supported his efforts. She talked about Doreen Whitlock, about her own ambivalence towards the woman; empathizing with her suicidal depression and oppressive marriage, while being repulsed at what she had done to her own children. As she talked, Alex looked up at Tom and realized that he was a parent; he would share her revulsion at what Doreen had done. She talked until she couldn't talk anymore, finally falling silent and looking up at Tom to gauge his reaction. He didn't react; he simply tightened his arm around her and gently began tracing his finger across her jaw and under her ear, causing her to tingle.

Alex reached up and pulled his face down to hers and kissed him deeply, grateful that he hadn't tried to talk her out of what she was feeling or make suggestions on how to "get over it". He simply listened and accepted her feelings for what they were….feelings.

"Alex," he whispered. "Stay here tonight. Stay with me."

She hesitated for a moment. She had never spent the entire night with him. She drew back to look at him again and then nodded her head. He smiled down at her and lowered his head for another kiss. This time when they made love, it was slow, gentle, and leisurely. Afterwards, Alex snuggled close against him and kissed his chest. She felt him drop a soft kiss on top of her head as she drifted off to sleep.

******************************************************************

Annie pulled a pan of cookies out of the oven and slipped another one in. The aroma of warm chocolate chip cookies filled the house. She transferred the cookies to a rack to cool, putting one on a napkin and taking it to the table. Sitting at the table, she reveled in the feel and taste of warm, soft chocolate on her tongue.

It was Annie's day off and she was not working at the soup kitchen. After getting the children to school, she decided she was in the mood to bake. There were two apple pies cooling on the counter alongside the first batch of cookies.

Bobby had been quiet since returning to work. When he came home at night, she could see that he was in pain, but he denied it. She also knew that he was bothered by the few pounds he had gained since injuring his knee. He refused to talk about the cases he and Alex were working on. Annie saw the pictures in the newspaper of two pretty girls who had been kidnapped; one found dead and the other found wandering the streets, suffering from brain damage. She asked Bobby if it was his case and he confirmed that it was, but refused to talk about it.

She deduced they were working on the case of the mother who killed three of her young sons after Bobby woke her late one night. He asked her pointed questions about how stressful it was for her to have three young children, especially when the twins were babies and toddlers. He wanted to know if she felt he had pressured her to go back to work after the children were born, if he had been too demanding of her, if he had done enough to help her, if she ever felt overwhelmed. Annie assured him that though there were times she felt overwhelmed, he had always been supportive and helpful.

Annie sighed as she licked the last of the chocolate off her fingers. Everything seemed so hard since the rift between herself and Frances. There were moments when she and Bobby connected just as they always had. But more often she felt him withdrawing from her, closing in on himself. She didn't know how to react when he did. Theirs had always been such an open and honest relationship; she was unsure of what to do about this new distance.

Sighing, she threw her napkin away, washed her hands, and began mixing dough for oatmeal cookies. The silence was beginning to feel oppressive, so she slid a CD into the player. Throbbing Latin music began to play and she turned it up. Standing at the kitchen counter, measuring ingredients into a bowl, her hips began to sway in time to the music. Fast-paced Salsa music filled the house and Annie laughed with delight and began to dance. She moved away from the counter and closed her eyes, caught up in the feel of the beat. Worries and doubts faded as she danced the Salsa around the kitchen.

******************************************************************

Bobby was quiet as he and Alex drove from Ron Carver's office to One Police Plaza. Back in the squad room, Alex watched him surreptitiously from across their desks. He had not reacted or responded at all when Carver informed them that John Tagman had been murdered in prison. They worked in silence the rest of the morning.

At lunchtime Alex asked, "Do you want to go to the deli for lunch, Bobby?"

He shook his head and pushed his chair back from his desk. "No thanks. I think I'm going to go home early today. My knee is bothering me."

Alex raised her eyebrows in surprise. This was the first time he had complained about his knee since returning to work.

"OK," she said.

She watched him walk to the captain's office. Bobby knocked on the door and opened it.

"Excuse me, Captain. Can I talk to you?"

"Sure, Bobby, c'mon in." James Deakins looked up from the reports he was filling out as the big detective stepped into his office and closed the door.

"Captain, I'd like to leave early. My….uh…knee is painful….and I'd like to go home and rest it."

"OK, go ahead. I hope you're feeling better tomorrow."

"Thank you, Captain."

Captain Deakins watched Bobby walk to the door. As he opened it to leave the captain said, "You know, Carver called and told me about Tagman. I'm sorry, Detective. I know it was important to you to help him get life rather than the death penalty."

Bobby nodded his head. "Thank you, Captain."

John Tagman filled his thoughts as he drove home. He was good at getting into the minds of murderers, good at connecting with them, in order to find a weakness that he could exploit to coax a confession. He tried to let go of them once they closed a case. But some of them stuck with him. Wally Stevens had been one that he couldn't let go of, becoming his pen pal after he went to prison. He empathized with the strange, lonely man who was unable to connect with people.

John Tagman was another one that he knew he would not easily forget; another lonely man unable to connect with people. That loneliness had led him to kidnap two young women in an attempt to create a girlfriend for himself. Although horrified at the torture Tagman subjected the girls to, Bobby had found himself feeling sorry for the young man as he delved into his mind.

He knew that Ron Carver, Captain Deakins, even Eames, had not understood his stand that Tagman did not meet the requirements for the death penalty. Carver would not soon forget his interference that had led to a plea deal for Tagman, saving him from capitol punishment. Eames had let him know that she didn't understand or approve, either, but had stood united with him in front of Carver. While in Carver's office that morning, they were notified that Tagman had been murdered in prison. Alex's sarcastic remark, directed at Carver and his initial insistence on seeking the death penalty, had been appreciated. But still he was left with the image imprinted on his memory of the tortured, lonely man tormented by the horror of his own actions.

Before Annie came into his life, he had felt that same loneliness, that same inability to connect. In his case it had been deliberate, not wanting other people to see just how destructive his home life had been. If not for Annie and his children, that aching, unrelenting loneliness most likely would have been his life.

But Annie _did_ come into his life, as well as three beautiful children he adored. After hearing about Tagman's murder, he suddenly wanted to see Annie. He wanted to see her smile, run his fingers through her hair, hear her laugh, smell the lilac scent of her, taste her lips beneath his.

He pulled into the driveway next to Annie's SUV. As he walked up the front steps, he could hear music. He stood outside the door for a moment, frowning in concentration. He could feel the throbbing beat of the music even here outside. That was unlike his wife. She usually preferred the soft crooning of Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra.

He opened the door and stepped inside. The music was deafening in here. The aroma of baking cookies permeated the house. He moved through the living room towards the kitchen. There he caught sight of Annie, her long blond hair loose and flying around her face as she danced. Bobby stopped in the doorway, mesmerized by the joy and elation on her face. Her eyes were closed and she was moving with abandon around the kitchen; yet she didn't run into anything, seeming to know instinctively exactly where to place her feet. Her arms were extended as her hips swayed quickly to the beat of the music.

Bobby quietly leaned against the wall and watched his wife as she ran her hands under her hair and lifted her arms, letting the soft strands run through her fingers, as she twirled around. His breath caught in his throat as he realized once again how stunning she was. Annie spun around again, opening her eyes slightly and catching sight of Bobby. She jumped and squealed in surprise, crossing her hands over her chest.

"You scared me," she said breathlessly.

Bobby didn't answer for a moment. He continued to stare at her and Annie's already flushed face burned even more as his dark eyes bore into her.

"Do you know how hot you are when you do that?" His voice was soft and low, causing a thrill to run up her spine.

"I know how hot you are when you look at me like that," she replied softly.

They stood still for a moment as the music continued to throb around them. Finally Annie said with a smile, "You're home early. Did you come home to dance with me?"

He grinned back at her. "I don't think my knee is up to the Salsa. But….maybe something slow….and soft."

Annie went to the CD player, turned the music down, and pushed a button to change CDs. As a soft, slow song began to play, she went to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Bobby pulled her close and rubbed his stubbled cheek against her smooth one, closing his eyes and inhaling the scent of her hair. She reached up to lay her hand on his cheek and he turned his head to drop a light kiss on her palm.

"Is there anything you want to talk about," she asked in a whisper.

Bobby lifted his head to look down at her. He gently traced the features of her face, trailing his finger down her throat to the sensitive hollow and causing a catch in her breathing. He smiled gently down at her and shook his head.

"No, I don't want to talk. I just want to dance with my wife and remember how grateful I am to be…..connected."

He closed his hand around hers, tightened his arm around her waist, and pulled her into a slow dance in their warm, fragrant kitchen.

**End chapter 6**

14


	7. Chapter 7

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 7**

_This chapter is set during and after Stress Position. _

_Thank you to Squarey for co-writing this chapter, specifically the last scene. _

_Thank you as always, Spook. You catch my boo-boos and inconsistencies. _

Mike turned his key in the lock and let himself into Gina's apartment. They had been dating five months and he spent a considerable amount of time at her apartment these days. The apartment was quiet as he entered and he thought for a moment that Gina wasn't there. But then he saw her in the bedroom, sitting on the foot of her bed. She was sitting still, staring straight ahead. Her eyes were red from crying, but she was sitting calmly.

"Gina?" Mike knelt in front of her. "What's wrong? Did something happen to your mother?"

She shook her head. "N…no, it's not my mother." She took a deep, shaky breath. "One of the guards from my prison was murdered this morning, Taylor Kenna."

"He was from your prison?! I heard about it, but they hadn't released his name or where he worked. Did you know him well?"

Gina nodded. "Yeah, he used to come into the infirmary and talk sometimes. He was studying to be a firefighter and I'm studying to be a paramedic. He passed his exam and was hired by the fire department. He was leaving soon." She sighed and shook her head. "I'm sorry, I…I don't know why I got so worked up. I'll go fix us some dinner, OK?" She tried to stand, but Mike pushed her gently back down.

"Hey, it's OK, Gina," he said softly. "A coworker was murdered. That would shake anyone." He put his arms around her and she laid her head on his shoulder. "Don't worry about dinner. We'll order pizza or something."

Gina closed her eyes and held back more tears. "Thank you," she whispered.

She said little over the next few days. When Mike tried to talk to her, she insisted she was fine. But on Friday night Mike arrived at her apartment and found her agitated. Still she refused to say much, but she did finally tell him that two detectives came to the prison and talked to her about Kenna. She was obviously upset about their visit, which he couldn't understand. Mike knew that it only made sense for the detectives to talk to Kenna's coworkers to try and find out who might have had a motive to kill him. However, Mike was certain that she was afraid of something, but he couldn't get anymore information out of her. She finally showed him the card that one of the detectives had given her.

After she excused herself and locked herself in the bathroom to take a shower. Mike looked at the card. "Detective Robert Goren—Major Case Squad—NYPD". He tucked it in his pocket and decided that on Monday he would go to One Police Plaza. He wanted to have a talk with this Detective Robert Goren and find out just what he had said to Gina that had her so scared.

******************************************************************

Three weeks later, Annie was setting the table for dinner. She ran her finger around the delicate flowers on the rim of a plate. Tonight's dinner party was a good excuse to use her fine china. Alex would be there with Tom Spencer. She knew Alex had been dating him for some time, but Annie had not seen him since the day they met on the side of a busy highway where a small boy had been hit by a car. Annie and Tom had worked together, doing CPR, until the ambulance arrived. She would always remember the sight of that small boy in the big firefighter's arms. Also joining them would be Mike Logan and Gina Lowe. She knew Mike vaguely, having met him in the ER years earlier when he was a detective for the homicide division of the 27th precinct. She had never met Gina, but knew that she was Mike's girlfriend, she was a nurse, and that until recently she had worked at Brooklyn Federal Prison.

When Annie read about the "secret prisoners" and their torture at the hands of a few guards, she remembered the night that Bobby came home very late and asked him if this was his case. He confirmed that he and Alex had worked on it but, as was beginning to happen much more frequently, he did not want to talk about it. However, Alex had told her some of the details of what went on, including the fact that Mike Logan had inserted himself into the investigation because of Gina, and that he and Bobby had faced down four guards in order to protect Gina. She also told Annie that Captain Deakins had been very impressed with the detective and was considering asking for his transfer to Major Case. Annie had insisted, over Bobby's objections, on organizing a dinner to meet Logan and Gina—as well as to spend some time with Alex and Tom.

The table was set, the salad was made and was chilling in the refrigerator, the lasagna was almost done baking, and the garlic bread was ready to go in the oven just before serving dinner. Bobby was still upstairs, showering and changing clothes from work. The children were spending the night next door with Janey and Rob. Annie sat down on one of the dining room chairs and relaxed with a soda.

It was just over a week since Thanksgiving. _A whole year since my "banishment",_ Annie thought wryly. It was her turn to work this holiday, so Bobby and the children had gone to Carmel Ridge to spend the day with Frances. They were home before she got home from work, and Bobby insisted on taking them all out to dinner. She sighed as she thought about last Thanksgiving, with the work and preparations she had put into it. She had been so excited to have Frances and Frank join them, as well as Grandpa. But then it had all gone so terribly wrong. She wasn't sure anything would ever be the same.

She had gotten some good news, though. True to her word, Olivia Benson had stopped by the ER one day this week to tell Annie about the four children she had wanted so desperately to take home; Judy, Sammie, Mikey, and baby Susie. According to Olivia, they had been placed with a wonderful, loving foster family; a mother, a father, and one child just about Judy's age. Olivia told her that they were doing very well. Judy and Sammie had started school; the foster mother had worked with them all summer to get them ready, especially Judy who was so far behind. Olivia said that Judy had started out the year somewhat behind her classmates, but had quickly caught up, thanks to the tutoring of her foster mother. Mikey was in a preschool program three mornings a week and had become a happy, chubby little boy. She said that even Susie, the somber baby who rarely cried or smiled, was beginning to catch up to her developmental milestones.

"You know," Olivia said, "the social worker, Lily, told me about the visit you had with the children that morning. She said that Susie smiled at your husband—the first time she had smiled since we brought her in, and the only time she smiled for quite a while, even after being placed with the foster family."

Annie smiled at her. "That's my Bobby—he can charm any female, even an infant."

Annie was glad to hear that the children were doing so well and that they had spent a very happy Thanksgiving with their new family. She wasn't sure she was as happy to hear that Children's Services was going forward with a plan to reunite them with their mother. She had escaped jail time for the neglect charges, but was on probation. Olivia said that she was attending parenting classes and having supervised visits with the children twice a week.

"Smells good," Bobby said as he walked in and leaned down to kiss her. He pulled a chair next to hers and sat down.

"It should be ready to come out of the oven soon." Annie smiled and ran her fingers through his damp curls, noticing for the first time a few gray strands. "Olivia Benson came to see me this week. She says the kids are with a good foster family and are doing really well."

"Good. I'm glad to hear that."

"But….well, they are trying to reunite them with their mother. I hope…." She trailed off.

Bobby looked down at the floor and nodded his head. "I know, Babe. I'm sorry…we just…"

"I know," she interrupted. "I know we couldn't. And even if we had taken them, they would still be having visits with their mother…Children's Services would still be planning to reunite them. The important thing is that they are being taken care of." She leaned her forehead against his and closed her eyes. "Maybe you were right…that I need to be needed."

Bobby held her face between his hands and looked into her eyes. "I need you," he whispered. The timer rang in the kitchen. Bobby smiled at her and kissed her lightly on the lips. "I'll check on the lasagna," he told her. Together they went to the kitchen and put the finishing touches on dinner.

Listening to the talk around the table later that evening, Annie was glad she had insisted on this dinner. Everyone seemed comfortable and to genuinely like the others. Gina was uncomfortable at first, but when she found out that Annie was also a nurse she began to relax and open up. Annie watched Tom and Alex surreptitiously. At least she thought she was being surreptitious until Bobby nudged her under the table. She smiled at him as he frowned slightly and shook his head almost imperceptibly. She knew as well as he did that Alex would not be pleased if she caught Annie beaming with joy at her and Tom. So she tried to control her facial expressions, but couldn't help the giddy feeling at the thought of the possibility of Alex being in love. She was enjoying getting to know Tom. They had only met once, under traumatic circumstances, and he had gained her respect that day. But seeing him now, laughing and joking with Mike and Bobby, turning his full attention (and devastating smile) on Alex each time she spoke, Annie was liking him more and more each moment.

Everyone pitched in to clear the table after eating. Tom and Mike were both impressed to hear that Bobby owned a 1967 Mustang and asked to see it before they sat down to enjoy the cheesecake Annie had made for dessert. The women preferred to go straight to the cheesecake. Annie and Alex asked Gina questions about herself, trying to draw her out. The conversation turned to the reason Bobby and Alex had met her; the investigation that led to the discovery of "secret prisoners". Gina described the confrontation Bobby and Mike had with the corrupt guards. She was overwhelmed by the realization that the men she had worked with were planning to harm her.

"I was so scared when they came after us in that hallway," she said. "If Mike and Bobby hadn't been there…." She shuddered slightly and was silent for a moment before going on. "Mike was…well, Mike. He was ready to just jump in and start fighting. He told them that…well, that they would take at least one of them with them, and that the death penalty would be for the others. I thought that…." She faltered and Annie reached across to squeeze her hand. "Anyway, Bobby told me to tell what I had seen, the injuries I had seen on the secret prisoners. I did, and then Bobby started talking to each one of them. It was amazing; it was like he was inside their heads or something. He knew things about them…not just the stuff that he could have found in their personnel files, but how they think, how they feel. I couldn't believe it when Hector threw down his stick and walked away. And then Rollie did the same thing. Then Doug put his stick away and he walked us out. I've never seen anything like that. How does he do that?"

Alex shrugged. "I don't know, but I've seen it over and over. It's like Bobby not only knows _how_ they think, he actually _thinks_ their thoughts. He just seems to instinctively know their weakest spot and he hones in on that until they are completely defenseless."

Annie listened in silence, realizing that this was a part of Bobby's life she had never seen. Although he talked to her about cases…or at least he used to talk to her about them; he seemed to do less and less of that lately. But when he did talk about a case, it was as though he was using Annie as a sounding board to process his own feelings about it. She had only occasionally seen him in his capacity as a cop, on the rare instances that he came to interview a victim in the ER. But she had never seen him with a suspect, had never seen this side of him that Gina and Alex were describing.

"After Doug opened the gate, Bobby and I walked out with him. But Mike went back and picked up one of the sticks from the floor and faced down Kurt Plumm like he wanted to go after him. But Bobby called him to come with us and he threw the stick down." She sighed and took a sip of coffee. "Even though Plumm and the others are gone and the secret prisoners aren't secret anymore…I just couldn't stay. I quit and didn't even give any notice. I got a job at a hospital on Staten Island. It doesn't pay as much, but it'll do until I pass my paramedic exam."

Annie shook her head and sighed. "I could never work in a prison. I don't even like it when the police bring suspects in before taking them in to be booked. It's not just that I would be scared working in a prison," she said thoughtfully. "Although, I would be very scared. But when the police bring someone in and I see this man or woman with hands cuffed behind…it's just…depressing? Does that make sense?"

Gina nodded her head. "Yeah, it does. It is depressing."

The men returned from the garage, talking about cars and engines, and Annie got up to serve them cheesecake and coffee. She watched Bobby as he laughed at something Mike said. She was glad to see him enjoying himself, especially knowing that he had only agreed to this dinner because she wanted it. That was one of the many things she loved about him, his willingness to step out of his comfort zone just to please her.

As they stood in the doorway, saying goodbye to the two couples, Bobby kept his arm around her and she leaned into the warmth of his body. He helped her clean up in the kitchen and they went upstairs. Bobby lay on the bed, watching her go about her bedtime routine. She climbed on the bed and sat cross-legged, facing him.

"I remember reading about Mike hitting that city councilman. And I remember all the broken hearts when he stopped coming by the ER," Annie told him with a smile.

Bobby grinned at her. "Was yours one of those broken hearts?"

"Hardly. I already had my own hunky cop to come home to." Bobby rolled to his side and propped his head on his hand. "I like Tom," she told him. "He's crazy about Alex."

"Uh huh…" Bobby traced designs on her leg with his finger, sending little sparks through her. "You need to keep a lid on that….uh….enthusiasm. Eames will not be amused."

"I'll try." She sighed. "But I can't help being happy to see her happy. She and Tom just seem….happy," she said with a laugh, at a loss for a better word. "Now Mike and Gina, on the other hand, are a different story entirely."

"Really? How so?"

"They won't be together much longer. If this whole thing at the prison hadn't happened, they probably would have broken up already. But the danger and drama of what they went through together, and her gratitude that you and Mike saved her…well, it's kept them connected for a while. But it'll wear off and they will drift apart."

"Really," he said again in an amused voice.

She nodded with conviction. "They don't have that connection that will keep them together long term."

"And you know this how?"

Annie shrugged and grinned at him, then lay down with her back to him and scooted against him until he was spooning her. "I know a little something about human nature, too, Mr. Detective."

He laughed softly and circled his arms around her, kissing her ear. He tucked her head under his chin and Annie wiggled against him slightly to get comfortable.

"Bobby…" she said hesitantly. "You never told me how Thanksgiving was."

"It was fine," he said softly.

"But…did your…" she stopped, changed her question. "How was the food?"

"It was fine. Just the usual Thanksgiving food; turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie. A lot of family members came. It was….nice." Annie didn't ask the question foremost on her mind, but Bobby answered it anyway. "She didn't ask about you, Babe," he said softly, kissing the top of her head.

Lying in the comfort of Bobby's arms, she thought about what Gina and Alex had said earlier. It had always amazed her that he knew her so well that he almost seemed to read her mind. She knew that part of that was the fact that she had never learned to hide her emotions and they showed clearly on her face. But it went deeper than that. He could read her moods and thoughts better than even Grandpa had ever been able to; he knew her weaknesses and fears, as well as what brought her joy. She was glad that she had never tried to keep secrets from him because it sometimes felt like he was inside her head. It had never occurred to her that he had that same ability to understand intimate details about suspects; that he used it to actually break down their defenses. With her it had always been something he used to enhance intimacy. She wondered what it was like for the people he was trying to break down. The thought caused a slight shiver to run through her and Bobby tightened his arms around her and pulled her even closer. Closing her eyes, she felt a warm heaviness drift over her body as sleep approached.

******************************************************************

Bobby found himself wandering through the darkness of the house. Even though most every night he went to bed at the same time as his wife, he rarely managed to fall asleep at the same time. As years went by, he convinced himself that was because he needed fewer hours of sleep. Of course that went against science; people do not need less sleep as they get older. However, Bobby conveniently overlooked the science of sleep and dutifully ignored the reasons he wasn't sleeping like he used to.

He poured the rest of the bottle of wine into one of the wine glasses drying on the rack on the kitchen counter and made his way back toward the dining room table. He sat in the same place he had sat at dinner. It was the head of the table. Even after all of these years it still felt funny to sit here, in his house, with his family, at the head of the table. The position was so incredibly fragile.

He drank the dry red wine and thought about the conversation earlier. Well, really he thought about the people. Eames at his house for dinner with her, um, boyfriend. Eames had a boyfriend. He smiled like a middle school kid over such a middle school thought.

Mike Logan seemed like a good enough guy. He had an uneven rep in the department, but who was he to judge a guy by his rep. Logan had handled himself well during the entirety of the case. And if Bobby had gone by the guy's rep alone, then Logan would have led with aggression first in those final moments in the prison. Instead the Staten Island detective had exercised judgment and let Bobby work toward reasoning with the guards.

He swirled the wine in the glass and watched it cling and slip down the sides. A nice evening with friends, with his wife, in his house. Each and every moment, Annie added value, she gave him possibility, something he had never had as a boy.

"Baby, come to bed," Annie surprised him. He hadn't heard her come downstairs.

"It was a nice evening." He drained the rest of the glass of wine. He reached over for her, his large hands on her rounded hips, and gently pulled her over to stand in front of him.

"Yes." She nodded, warm and slow from sleep. She ran her hands softly through his hair. Slowly he lifted her up to sit on the table.

"We should do that more often," he mumbled, moving her bathrobe aside so he could run his hands up her legs. She laughed, causing him to look up at her.

"I like to have people over for dinner," she smiled down at him, and he knew she was teasing him, because it was on him that they didn't have people over more often.

"Yeah, I know," he moved his hands up her thighs so slowly that his fingers splayed open from the gentle pressure of his skin on her skin. He could feel her breath hitch in her chest. "The kids, they're at Janey's for the night," he leaned forward and kissed her thigh just above her knee. She still hadn't let go of her breath and now he could feel her trembling beneath his kiss. So, he kissed her again, this time higher, and he used his hands to spread her thighs more open. She moved her hands to be on top of his hands, her fingernails sinking in to his skin as she moved his touch higher. He kissed her once more, very high, very softly, and she shivered. He stood slowly in front of her, his hands still on her, moving in toward her, and his mouth found hers. "I love you Annie," he whispered against her lips, and she nodded, at a loss for words. Her only response was to open her legs to him completely.

**End Chapter 7**

9


	8. Chapter 8

**TREMORS**

**CHAPTER 8**

_Thank you Spook for being such a good (and quick) beta. Your computer must be the busiest one I know, but you always get back to me quickly. _

_Once again, Squarey has contributed a scene…and again it's the very last one. Thank you!_

Mike Logan sat at the bar in Peter J's, nursing a beer. It was late January and he had already decided 2005 was going to suck. Lennie Briscoe's death in December had cast a pall over the holidays. Mike still felt in shock. The last time he had seen Lennie, after his retirement, he noticed that he had lost weight. But he seemed happy and energetic; he was talking about going to work for the DA's office as an investigator. He said nothing about being sick. Mike knew that Lennie had taken the job with the DA's office, but hadn't seen him again. Until he got the call that Lennie had passed away. Gina had been sweet and supportive, but they both knew that their relationship was over. The events at the prison had brought them closer briefly, but they both finally admitted the inevitable and parted amicably.

Parted amicably. Mike thought about that phrase. He was an expert at breaking up with a woman in such a way that they could remain friends. But amicably or not, the parting always seemed to be inevitable. _Well, almost always,_ he thought, remembering one dark-haired woman. He had parted amicably with Sarah, too. But, while he usually knew a break-up was coming long before it happened, and found it a relief when it did finally happen, with Sarah it had been different. He should have seen it coming; he realized now that there had been plenty of signs that she wasn't ready to let go of her deceased husband. But it had been different with Sarah. Although he knew it was the right thing to do, there had been no sense of relief that it was over. It felt like they hadn't had a chance to really start a relationship. Sex had always been an important part of his relationships, yet with Sarah he hadn't minded that it hadn't happened. He was ready to wait as long as it took for her to be ready. He moved on, with Gina, but he still felt no closure with Sarah.

"Uh…Mike? Mike…Logan, is it?" A voice interrupted his reverie and he looked up see a man standing next to him. It took a moment to place where he knew him from and then he realized this was the man who had been with Sarah the night he and Gina were coming out of the movie theater.

"Yeah….and you are…Jerry?" Mike shook hands with the man.

"I'm here with a couple of friends and thought I recognized you. How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks. How are you? And, uh, how is Sarah?"

"I'm good. Sarah's good." Jerry hesitated a moment. "I should get back to my friends. Good to see you. Are you waiting for your….girlfriend?"

"My girlfriend?" Mike looked at him quizzically. "Oh…Gina? No, Gina and I aren't together anymore. I'm here alone. But I was just getting ready to leave. Tell Sarah….uh, tell her hello from me, OK?"

"Sure, I'll do that."

Jerry watched the detective get up and walk out of the bar, lost in thought.

******************************************************************

"So?" Sarah sat across from Jerry in a diner near the library. He had dropped in and insisted she go to lunch with him. Once settled, he told her about running into Mike Logan at the bar….alone.

"So maybe you should give him a call," Jerry told her.

"Why would I do that?"

"Because he's available, you're available. Unless you've found your soul mate in the three weeks since I saw you last."

Sarah stuck her tongue out at him and then laughed. "No, no soul mates. But it's been almost a year since Mike and I went out. What makes you think he wants to now?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe he doesn't. But you do. And you won't know if he does unless you ask."

"And who says I want to go out with Mike Logan?"

"I do. Look, Sarah, you said that both of you agreed that you weren't ready for a relationship and that's why you stopped seeing one another. A year has gone by and I know you haven't jumped into any long term relationships, but you've been dating and you've stopped wearing your wedding ring. Maybe it's time to consider the possibility of a real relationship with another man."

Sarah smiled. "I have a relationship with you."

"A _romantic_ relationship…don't be obtuse."

She shrugged. "But I was really starting to care about him, and it was hard when we decided not to see each other anymore. What if I start seeing him again and it doesn't work out…again?"

"Well," Jerry crossed his arms and leaned them on the table, "that holds true with every man you go out on a date with, doesn't it? I mean, it might lead to something long term or it might not. I think the only way to avoid the 'what ifs' is to join a convent and never date again."

"Yes…" she said thoughtfully. "But Mike…." She hesitated and blushed. "Mike isn't like anyone else I've dated. I think…." She trailed off.

"You think _he_ might be someone that you want something long term with, and you haven't wanted that with anyone else since Tony died."

Jerry grinned at the blush that crept over her face as he finished her thought. She didn't answer and he let the subject drop. But as he walked her back to the library before returning to his office, he gave her a hug.

"You don't have to do anything right now, but just think about calling him, OK?" She nodded and hugged him back.

Two weeks later, Sarah smiled when she looked up to see Annie Paine and her children entering the front door of the library. The children brought the books they were returning to the bin next to the desk and then they gathered around Sarah to tell her how much they liked the books they had just read.

"Well, I think I missed this tribe the last time you came in. What have you all been up to? No more shaving the dog, I hope?"

Sarah and Annie laughed as the children giggled. Annie had told Sarah about the twins shaving poor Sandy after reading a book about lions that Sarah had recommended to them.

"No," Andrew told her earnestly, "but we went to a funeral."

Sarah stopped laughing. "Oh I'm sorry to hear about that. Was it a family member?"

Phillip said, "Daddy says he's family 'cause he was a cop."

"A cop?" Sarah looked at Annie. "Uncle Jimmy didn't mention anything about a cop dying."

Annie shook her head. "He didn't die on the job and the captain may not have known him. Before he retired, he was a homicide detective at the 2-7. And…he worked on my case a few years ago."

"Daddy says Detective Briscoe was a good guy," Ally told her.

Sarah blinked and looked from Ally back to Annie. "Detective Briscoe? L…Lennie Briscoe?"

"Yes, did you know him?"

Sarah nodded slowly, memories of a Super Bowl party overwhelming her. "Yes…at least I met him once. He was a friend of…a friend. He…he was very nice."

"Yes," Annie agreed, "Lennie Briscoe was a prince. He'll be missed."

Sarah thought about Mike and his friendship with Lennie. Annie was right; Lennie would be missed. She wondered how Mike had taken the news. She smiled and waved as Annie and the children moved off towards the stacks. She enjoyed the Goren family; the children always looked as though they were on a treasure hunt as they looked for books to take home.

Sarah stopped on the way home to look for a birthday present for her father. Wandering through the men's department, her eyes fell on the racks of ties and she stopped to look through them…wondering if a tie was too boring to give to her father. She let the ties slip through her fingers, enjoying the varied colors and the feel of the different fabrics. Suddenly she stood riveted as she looked at one tie lying across her palm. Thin lines of red and blue against a dark blue background formed a plaid pattern. She stared at the tie as memories of a tall, dark-haired detective with an infectious smile swirled through her. She remembered the night she met him at Peter J's, while on a disastrous blind date with another man, the way his eyes had lit up with appreciation at the sight of Tony's Cadillac, the sound of his laugh….the feel of his lips on hers and his arms around her.

Sarah's fingers closed around the tie and she pulled it from the rack. Making a decision, she marched up to the checkout and paid for the tie before she could change her mind. She asked to have it gift-wrapped…in Valentine's wrapping. With the package under her arm, she made her way out of the store. She could shop for her father over the weekend. Tonight there was something she needed to do.

*****************************************************************

Mike sat on his couch, flipping channels on the television…looking for something that wasn't a romance. He sighed in disgust. There didn't seem to be anywhere to go to escape Valentine's Day, not even his own apartment. He finally settled on CNN; news about wars and famine would be preferable to another sappy love story. He decided whoever had invented Valentine's Day was a sadist. It was a holiday that created unrealistic expectations that were doomed. Single people felt like failures for not finding "the one". Couples felt like failures because inevitably one or both of them fell short of the "perfect romantic gift".

He was right…2005 sucked. Lennie's death, breaking up with Gina, and now….he closed his eyes and allowed the thought he had been holding at bay to bounce around in his mind. Today was one year since he and Sarah decided to stop seeing one another. _It's been a year Logan, and it was never that serious anyway. Let it go. _A knock on the door pulled his attention away from the dark laughing eyes that still haunted him. He looked at the clock, wondering who would be dropping in on him. Mike opened the door to find those same dark eyes looking at him.

"Sarah? Wh…what are you doing here?"

She looked at him hesitantly. "I…I just heard about Lennie. I'm so sorry Mike. If I had known, I would have called you. Lennie was so nice and I…I know how close you were."

Mike smiled sadly at her. "Thank you, Sarah. I appreciate that. But…you didn't have to make a trip over here. You could have called."

She nodded and looked down at his jeans and bare feet. He could see the tension on her face as she clutched her purse tightly in front of her. She took a deep, shaky breath and looked up at him, not quite meeting his eyes.

"Mike…are you…seeing anyone? Anyone special?"

He managed to stop his mouth from dropping open. "Uh…no…no one special." At her silence he asked softly, "Are you?"

Now she looked at his eyes, but glanced away quickly, shaking her head no. She was so obviously uncomfortable that Mike was tempted to say something, anything, to ease the tension. But he didn't, waiting in silence for her to make the next move. Finally she took another deep breath, squared her shoulders, and raised her head, meeting his gaze.

"I have only had sex with one man in my life….my husband," she announced.

Mike fought to keep the smile off his face, especially when he caught sight of his elderly neighbor in the doorway of her apartment directly behind Sarah…with a scandalized look on her face. She quickly stepped back into her apartment and closed the door. He folded his arms across his chest and leaned his shoulder against the door frame.

"OK," he said.

"I don't think I can have sex with a man unless I am in love with him, and I don't know if I'm in love with you."

"OK," he repeated, dangerously close to laughing.

"But I'd like to find out."

"You would?"

"Yes I would. So if you are interested in seeing me, you know how to get in touch with me." She reached into her purse and pulled out a package wrapped in paper covered with hearts. She slapped the package against his chest with more force than necessary and he caught it before it could fall. "Happy Valentine's Day," Sarah said. She turned and walked quickly towards the stairway.

"Hey," he called just as she started down. She stopped and turned towards him, her hand on the banister. "Do you like spaghetti?"

"Do I…what?" She looked confused.

"Do you like spaghetti," he repeated slowly.

"Yes," she said uncertainly.

"Mrs. Ponce, down the hall…she likes to cook and bring me food. She always brings way too much…and tonight she brought me spaghetti. There's more than enough for two people…if you're hungry." When she didn't answer, he added, "There's garlic bread, too."

A small smile teased at the corners of her mouth. She turned and walked back, stopping to stand in front of him. He was still leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed; now holding the package she had thrust at him.

"I stopped wearing my wedding ring," she told him softly.

Mike smiled at her. "Is that a good thing?" She nodded her head wordlessly and Mike said, "Well then…congratulations."

The blush that crept over her face caused Mike to grin at her. He straightened and stepped aside so she could enter. He turned off the TV (who needed the pressure of romantic movies?) and put a CD on. Soft strains of jazz created a peaceful background as they talked.

They sat on the couch to eat Mrs. Ponce's spaghetti and meatballs. Mike poured a glass of wine for each of them and relaxed against the cushions, remembering all over again how easy she was to talk to. She asked him about Lennie and he felt relief to be able to tell story after story about his friend.

He could see her nervousness give way to ease as she listened to his stories. She smiled and her face lit up with pleasure. They caught up on the events of the last year, talking and laughing for well over two hours. He opened the present she had brought and was touched that she remembered the story of his plaid ties. Sarah helped him wash the dishes and put the remainder of the spaghetti in the refrigerator. Mrs. Ponce did indeed prepare an enormous amount of food. Except for an occasional brush of fingers when handing one another a plate or a glass they didn't touch, instead keeping an unspoken agreement not to rush. Sarah watched him putting the plates in the cupboard, his back to her. She admired the way his tee shirt hitched up, exposing jeans that just clung to his hips, not quite tightly enough to be constrictive. He turned as she was lost in thought and caught her watching him. He smiled as he crossed his arms and leaned his hip against the counter.

Sarah blushed furiously and said, "I really should go now, it's getting late." He said nothing as he continued to grin knowingly at her. She chuckled and shook her head. "Thank you for dinner, Mike. I had a nice time tonight."

"So did I. Thank you for coming over." He stood up and moved towards the living room. "Let me get my shoes and socks on so I can walk you to your car."

"You don't need to do that."

"Yes I do," he said firmly.

Still he didn't touch her as they walked the two blocks to her car.

"No Caddy tonight?" Mike sounded disappointed and Sarah laughed.

"Did you walk me to my car just so you could see the Caddy," she teased.

"No," he said, stepping closer. Her back was against the car and Mike stood facing her, not quite touching, with his hands resting on the roof of the car on either side of her. "I walked you to your car because I thought it would be safer to do this in a public place," he said softly as he lowered his head to hers.

Her gasp of surprise was cut off when his mouth covered hers. Her lips opened beneath his and she returned his kiss with passion. She followed his lead, however, and did not touch him except for the contact of the kiss. He rotated his head and took his time slowly exploring her mouth with his tongue and coaxing hers to explore his in return. After what seemed like hours, Mike pulled away and looked into her half-closed eyes.

"Good night, Sarah," he said softly, reaching behind her to open her door.

"Good night," she whispered as she slipped into the driver's seat.

_Maybe,_ Mike thought as he walked back to his apartment, _just maybe 2005 won't suck after all._

******************************************************************

Uncharacteristically, Bobby found himself alone in his house. Someone was always around, which was most definitely a good thing. He liked the sounds, the smells, the life of his home. He'd had enough quiet in his life. Even on the occasions that he retreated to his office for head space to work through some details of a case that he couldn't quite leave at the squad, he relished the sounds of his family upstairs, the clomping of feet, the running of water, the laughter. He even smiled over the arguing voices of the boys and the way Annie's calm voice always seemed to bring things around.

He looked at the fresh flowers he had brought home for Valentine's Day. No roses, he smiled wistfully. Annie often mentioned they seemed frightfully expensive for a flower with such a short shelf life. He figured that was part of her apparent aversion to roses for Valentine's Day. Truthfully, he guessed that she liked to defy convention a bit. Easy enough to pick up a dozen roses at the bus stop on Valentine's day. So, Bobby made a special trip to her favorite florist and asked for gathered stems of a variety of different colored Gerber daisies. They were brilliant and sunny and strong and long lasting – like Annie.

"Hey babe, we're home," Annie called as the door exploded open full of kids and life and love. He could hear the boys scramble for the front room hoping to get in a video game before dinner. He could hear his daughter's footsteps on the stairs. At least Ally called out a muffled, "hey dad" before she was entirely up stairs.

"Happy Valentine's Day." Annie's bright smile overshadowed the daisies as she entered the kitchen. "These are beautiful."

"Like you," Bobby articulated what he'd been thinking about earlier.

"They're perfect," Annie touched their strong stems and soft petals. "And don't you dare say, perfect like me." She winked.

"Happy Valentine's Day." Bobby kissed his wife on her temple.

"I took the kids to the library today," Annie offered as she closed her eyes against Bobby's kiss.

"Yeah?" Bobby wondered why Annie was bringing this up, she rarely just brought anything up out of the blue unless something was on her mind.

"Sarah, the librarian, she's so wonderful." Annie mused.

"Yeah, she is."

"I mentioned going to Detective Briscoe's funeral," Annie continued.

"And?"

"Nothing, though, well, Sarah looked sad, said she knew him, Detective Briscoe."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Detective Briscoe was partners with Mike Logan, right?"

"I don't know, yeah, I think so," Bobby stumbled over his reply knowing exactly where his wife's mind was headed.

"Do you suppose Mike Logan is still seeing Gina?"

"Always the matchmaker," Bobby took Annie into his arms.

"It is Valentine's Day," Annie laughed.

"Exactly, which is why we should stop talking and start…" Bobby laughed as well as he kissed his wife.

"Yes, this is better than talking," Annie murmured against his lips as she yielded into his arms.

"Then why are you still talking?"

**End Chapter 8**

11


	9. Chapter 9

**TREMORS **

**CHAPTER 9**

_This chapter picks up about 3 months after chapter 8…just at the end of My Good Name, and then jumps ahead 2 more months. _

_The scene with Bobby and Alex in the bar was written by Squarey._

_Thank you again to Spook for beta'ing. _

"There goes the greatest cop I ever knew."

Jimmy Deakins stood between Goren and Eames, watching Frank Adair being led from the squad room….in handcuffs. He wasn't sure which was harder; finding out that his old friend and boss was involved in extramarital affairs and two murders, or having to tell Frank's wife, Marie, what Frank had done. Deakins exchanged a look with his detectives then turned and walked into his office. He closed the door firmly and moved to his desk. His eye fell a paper lying on his desk. "Transfer Denied"….signed by the Chief of Detectives.

Sighing, he picked up the phone and called Angie. Telling his wife this sordid story wasn't much easier than telling Frank's wife had been. But Marie would need someone to prop her up, a strong shoulder to cry on, and there was no one better than Angie in a crisis. Glancing at her picture on his desk, hearing her confident voice on the phone reassuring him that she was on her way to Marie's, he was grateful once again that she had said yes to his proposal all those years ago.

Hanging up the phone, secure that Angie would know the right thing to say and do, he looked again at the paper on his desk. "Transfer Denied". This was the second time in six months that he had tried to get Mike Logan transferred to his squad. Being the elite squad that Major Case was, he had always had his pick of detectives. There had been questions when he asked to have Goren transferred. He had a reputation for "over thinking" and being unconventional; some said he would have been more suitable as a profiler for the FBI than a detective in this city. But all Deakins had to do was look at Goren's solve rate to see that he was a closer, and Deakins wanted him. He had decided to pair him up with the grounded, even-keeled Alex Eames. It was a good match, they complemented one another and worked well together…as evidenced by the highest solve rate in the squad.

He sighed and thought about Frank Adair. "The greatest cop I ever knew." Good cops were not a dime a dozen, especially not in a force the size of the NYPD, with its politics and occasional corruption. His gut feeling was that Mike Logan was a good cop. This was confirmed by Lieutenant Van Buren at the 2-7. Deakins had been impressed by the way Logan handled himself in the investigation into the prison, the way he worked with Goren and Eames, the description Goren had given of how he reacted inside the prison when faced with four corrupt guards. Logan was a good cop. He had made mistakes and he had paid for them. It was time to bring him out of exile and get him back to the work he was cut out for. Deakins picked up the transfer request with "Transfer Denied" stamped in red. He crumpled it with a snort of disgust and threw it into the trash can. He picked up the phone and told his secretary, "Get me the Chief of D's".

Mike Logan was a good cop and Jimmy Deakins wanted, needed, good cops in his squad. Whatever it took, he was going to bring Logan over. He had been right about Goren, he had been right about partnering Goren and Eames, and he knew he was right about Logan. It would take three more months and it would take calling in several favors owed to him throughout the department, but the Chief of Detectives finally relented and Detective Mike Logan was reassigned from Staten Island to the Major Case Squad.

******************************************************************

"I called my dad last night," Alex said. "I asked him what he remembered about Frank Adair, and he told me the exact same thing the captain said: 'He's the greatest cop I ever knew.' The captain said Adair was always the first man through the door…how do you go from being that kind of cop to murdering two people?"

Tom shook his head. "Three alarm fires I understand. Murderers are your area of expertise, Detective."

They were sitting on a bench in the park watching Tom's son push his daughter on the swing, while Alex's nephew slept in his stroller next to them.

"Bobby says that when a person starts compartmentalizing his life the way Adair did, it becomes possible to do something in one compartment that you wouldn't ever dream of doing in another. Like when Adair put his life as a husband and father in one compartment that was completely separate from the one where he had two mistresses; or when his life as a cop is in one compartment and his life as a politician who will do whatever he needs to protect his image is in another."

"Makes sense." Tom nodded his head thoughtfully.

"I just don't get it, though. As much as I love this little guy here," she reached over to adjust the blanket covering the baby, "I don't stop being a cop when I'm with him. And I don't stop being his aunt when I'm at work." She smiled ruefully at Tom. "I guess all my compartments are wide open."

He grinned at her. "So is there a compartment for me in your life?"

She kept her eyes on the children, but smiled at the question. "Yeah…there's a big compartment for you. But," she added, stopping him before he could put his arm around her, "there are three little compartments here right now…all with big eyes."

Tom withdrew his arm and laughed loudly, startling the baby, who settled back to sleep. He took Alex's left hand in his right, lacing his fingers with hers.

She smiled again, still not looking at him. "I'm glad you're in my life," she said softly.

Tom raised her hand to his lips and brushed a soft kiss across her knuckles. "Back at ya, Detective. Back at ya."

******************************************************************

Alex was running late meeting Bobby for drinks. She hated being late, but time just got away from her. She'd spent an incredible day with Tom and his kids and her nephew, and lingered at her sister's house when she stopped to drop her nephew back by.

"Sorry I'm late," the words were out of her mouth before she even sat down in the booth across from him.

"It's okay," he shrugged, pushing his empty glass around in front of him.

"I called but you didn't pick up." Alex looked for the waitress thinking she wasn't in the mood for anything much more than a beer. She watched Bobby fumble with his jacket and retrieve his phone.

"It's on vibrate, I must not've heard it," he admitted in such a way that he brought Alex's attention around.

"How long have you been waiting?"

"I dunno, an hour, maybe."

"But I'm only a half an hour late." When the server came by the table, Alex ordered a beer and turned her attention back around to Bobby, who ordered another scotch, neat.

"Got here early." After a few tries, he switched his phone back to having the ringer on.

"Yeah, yeah you did." Alex looked at him realizing that uncharacteristically her partner was a little drunk, or maybe more than a little, it was kind of hard for her to tell with him. "I was out with Tom," she admitted, and Bobby smiled a little, as if he thought that was a good thing but he didn't go on to say as much. Alex sat in silence for a few moments and then kind of blurted out what was on her mind, "I called my Dad and asked him about Frank Adair."

"What didja do that for?" Bobby took a sip of his drink before the server even set it on the table.

"Just didn't make any sense, for Deakins to think so highly of the guy and for things to land the way they landed."

"Things don't always make sense." Bobby said, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand.

"You said that when a person starts compartmentalizing his life the way Adair did, it becomes possible to do something in one compartment that you wouldn't ever dream of doing in another." Alex paused and then continued, "that seems to make sense."

"I don't know what I was talking about. You can't compartmentalize your life. What happens in one place always bleeds into the next." Alex looked at her partner for a long quiet moment. Now she was positive he was drunk. He wasn't his usual analytical self, what he'd said just then had a lot of personal spin. More than he usually revealed.

"What's going on?" Alex asked.

"My dad, you know," Bobby looked at her and then stopped talking. "You don't know," he shrugged as if he forgot he was talking with Alex and not Annie. Though, Alex did know more than he realized. She had put some things together over the years. His dad cheated on his family, with other women, by gambling.

"Marie, she seemed like she had no idea," Alex offered the words, wondering if Bobby's mom had any idea, or if Bobby had any idea. Clear enough to see looking back, but it must've been different when Bobby was a boy.

"I guess Adair was the greatest man at something, he was pretty great at keeping secrets from his family," Bobby polished off his drink. "I gotta go." Alex watched him stand slowly, drop some cash on the table for the check.

"Let me give you a ride," she offered.

"It's okay, I'll grab a cab." And he was gone before she could change his mind.

******************************************************************

Annie wandered down the row of books. Ally, having picked out her books, was sitting on the floor reading one of them while her mother perused the boring grown-up books. Annie loved libraries…even more than book stores. She loved owning books; loved to read her favorites over and over; loved the feel of a worn, well-loved book in her hands; loved to savor particularly beautiful passages. Although she loved owning books, there was something magical about a library that book stores didn't have. The books in book stores were brand new; recent, classic, or popular; there were several of any given title, sometimes even rows of a particular title or author. But libraries had the history of collecting books over years; in the case of the New York Public Library, more than a hundred years. It gave her pleasure to simply walk up and down the stacks, running her fingers along the spines of books; some brand new, some old and somewhat fragile. If she hadn't gone into nursing, she had always thought she might have been a librarian.

A librarian like Sarah. She was fond of the younger woman. Most of her contact with her had been here in this library, but there had been an occasional gathering at Captain Deakins' home where the two women had been able to sit and talk. Annie and Bobby had met Sarah's beautiful little daughter, Jia Li. They had met her late husband, as well, and Annie's heart went out to Sarah after his death, the aura of sadness around her almost palpable.

As she pulled a book from a shelf and looked it over, she wondered idly if Sarah was dating anyone special, or if she was dating at all. They weren't close friends, so Annie wasn't someone Sarah would have confided in. But Annie thought it would be nice to know that Sarah had someone special in her life. Maybe she was interested in meeting a handsome cop. She smiled as she looked up and saw the object of her reverie come around the corner.

"Annie! Hi, I didn't see you come in," Sarah greeted her. "Is the rest of the family here?"

"Yes, they are all here…somewhere. I'm sure my husband is over in the research department…trying to convince the boys that research is as much fun as reading fiction," she laughed. Sarah laughed with her and turned to move on, when Annie stopped her. "Sarah…I was just wondering…if you might be interested in meeting someone. A man…someone nice that I thought you….might like…." She stammered nervously.

Sarah smiled at her. "That's very nice, Annie, thank you. But I'm seeing someone already."

"You are?" Annie's face brightened, but good manners wouldn't allow her to ask any of the questions rushing through her mind.

Sarah saw the curiosity on Annie's always expressive face and laughed softly. Her attention was caught by the tall man, followed by two smaller versions of himself, walking softly up behind Annie and she smiled at him and then at Annie. "It's kind of a new relationship and I'm not really ready to talk about him. But when the time is right, I'll be happy to tell you all about him. I'll see you when you check out."

Annie smiled as Sarah walked away, then started as Bobby leaned down to laugh softly next to her ear. She hadn't seen or heard him approaching.

"You scared me," she exclaimed. "Warn me when you're sneaking up on me," she scolded teasingly.

"Ah," he said, dropping a light kiss on top of her head, "but then I wouldn't be able to catch you in your matchmaking schemes."

"Exactly," Annie laughed, turning towards him. She smiled up at him. He had been moody lately; she read about the arrest of Frank Adair and suspected he had worked on that case. A cop gone bad, even if he was a former cop, was something that would weigh on him. But today he was relaxed and enjoying his family. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

"Yes. Are you ready to go?"

"I'm ready," she sighed and Bobby chuckled at her, knowing that her suggestion that they visit the library today was geared primarily to lure Sarah into a blind date with Mike Logan.

"Then let's go…I'm hungry." She nodded and followed him towards the check-out desk, shushing three suddenly excited children trying to make their dinner preferences known.

******************************************************************

Sarah stood at the sink washing dishes. She had made dinner for Mike at his apartment. They had been dating for five months and she couldn't believe how happy she was. After Tony died, her focus had been on making sure that Jia Li had a happy childhood that was not overshadowed by the tragedy of her father's death. She had assumed that the rest of her own life would be spent in that shadow. At first she didn't think she would ever be interested in another man. Then Mike had come along and she began to think of the possibility of another relationship. But it was too soon and she wasn't ready to let Tony go. After she and Mike agreed to stop seeing each other she had dated a few men, but no one that she wanted more than friendship from. And then Mike had come back into her life.

He made her laugh and made her heart flutter. He took her to dinner, to movies, to jazz clubs, to ball games….and sometimes just to his apartment for a lazy Sunday afternoon spent on the couch with him watching a game and her reading a book. He accepted the relationship on her terms; seeing her when she was able to find a babysitter for Jia Li, only picking her up at her house if Jia Li was not there, understanding that her daughter had first claim on her time, accepting that she wasn't ready for sex. He never complained, never asked for more than she was willing or able to give. So, as Sarah stood at the kitchen sink in Mike Logan's apartment, she wondered if there really was such a thing as "the perfect man", because she thought he must be as close to perfect as it was possible to be.

Mike was talking, telling her a story while she washed dishes and he put leftover food in the refrigerator. She was only half-listening, enjoying the sound of his voice more than the actual words he was speaking, and enjoying the cozy feel of domesticity. As much as she loved the convenience of a dishwasher, she also enjoyed the feel of hot, sudsy water against the latex gloves that protected her hands, the slippery feel of the dishes as she rubbed the dish cloth over them, the water sheeting over them as she rinsed the soapy water off, and the way they gleamed in the dish drainer, waiting to be dried and put away. Such a visceral response to something as mundane as washing dishes, she thought. She watched the bright yellow gloves on her hands and it seemed incongruous to think of Mike Logan standing in a store, picking them out, deciding which gloves to wear to protect his hands from the soap and hot water.

It suddenly occurred to Sarah that he had fallen silent. She didn't turn, but she could feel his eyes on her, watching her, lingering on her hips as she leaned lightly against the counter. She felt more than heard him moving towards her, felt the heat of his body as he stood behind her, felt his breath flutter across her hair, and then his arms slowly and gently circling her waist, his chest coming into contact with the back of her shoulders, his lips brushing against her ear. She leaned her head back against him and closed her eyes as his lips moved to the sensitive spot just below her ear, then down to her throat. She shivered faintly as his tongue lightly skimmed over her skin.

"Do you have any idea how much you turn me on when you do that?" His lips were against her throat, his words murmured softly.

Sarah smiled, her eyes still closed. "Washing the dishes? You should see me take out the trash."

He chuckled softly and continued to nibble at her throat. Her heartbeat picked up as his thumbs began to softly circle on her ribs, just below her breasts. She relaxed back against him and wiggled her hips slightly, felt his breath catch at the movement. She opened her eyes and lifted her head, reached for the towel to dry the gloves before pulling them off her hands. She turned to face him, his arms still around her, his head lowered, which brought his mouth into contact with hers. Her hands rested lightly against his chest as he gently tugged her bottom lip with his teeth and then covered her mouth with his, his tongue teasing hers. Her hands closed to grip his shirt as he moved to kiss her face, eyes, and cheeks, back to her throat.

When he lifted his head, Sarah's hands moved up to cup his face. She rubbed the palm of one hand against his cheek and with the other began to trace his features with her forefinger. He closed his eyes and sighed as her hands traveled across his skin. She reached up to plant soft kisses on his chin and cheek, trailing her finger down his throat, his chest, coming to rest at the V of his shirt at the first button. Her other hand moved down to his shirt and her lips followed the trail down his throat. Her fingers gently opened the first button, then the second, moving lower. Mike froze, barely breathing as her lips left light kisses along his chest as she opened his shirt. Once it was completely unbuttoned her fingers brushed the bare skin of his stomach.

She raised her head and looked up into his eyes, her hands resting lightly on his waist. His hazel eyes darkened with desire as they stared at one another in silence for several long moments. Mike's hands moved to hold her face and he lowered his face to hers, almost touching. She felt his breath skitter across her skin as he looked at her intently.

"Are you sure," he whispered.

Wordlessly she nodded her head. Mike kissed her, gently at first, then building in passion as he deepened the kiss and pulled her face even closer. He raised his head and looked at her again for a moment, then straightened. Taking her hand he pulled her gently after him as he moved from the kitchen, through the living room, to his bedroom.

Once in the bedroom, Mike pulled her into his arms and kissed her. They didn't rush, taking their time and slowly undressing one another, enjoyed the slow revealing of their bodies. He pulled her onto the bed and they leisurely explored, reveling in the feel, taste, and scent that built their desire slowly, but steadily until Sarah couldn't wait any longer and pulled him to her.

Later, much later, Sarah lay sprawled on top of Mike, cheek against his chest, drowsy with satiation, feeling the air against the perspiration on their skin cooling them. His right hand was splayed across the small of her back as the fingers of his left hand idly twirled a strand of her dark hair. He gently kissed the top of her head.

"Can you stay?" His voice was low, soft, hoarse.

"Mmm, hmm." Her voice was also soft. "Jia Li is with her grandparents this weekend. So I'm all yours….if you want."

He wrapped his arms around her and flipped her onto her back, rolling on top of her. She squealed with surprise, smiling up at him as his hands framed her face.

"Oh I want, Sweetheart. Believe me, I want," he laughed before covering her mouth with his and stifling her laughter.

******************************************************************

Two weeks later, Sarah walked into Peter J's to meet Mike for a date. Before she had a chance to look around the bar for him he was there, grabbing her around the waist in an enthusiastic bear hug, lifting her off her feet as he planted a kiss on her mouth. Breathless with surprise, she didn't get a chance to ask him what was going on before he swept her to a corner table in the back of the room. She didn't think she had ever seen such a huge smile on his face.

"We are celebrating tonight," he told her.

Sarah laughed and asked, "What exactly are we celebrating?"

"My release from hell," Mike told her excitedly. "I'm getting a transfer out of Staten Island…to the Major Case Squad. One PP, Baby! Manhattan!"

"M..Major Case?" Sarah stammered with surprise. "H…How did that happen?"

"I worked a case with a couple of Major Case detectives last year…that prison thing that Gina was involved in. The captain decided he wanted me on the squad, but the last I heard, the Chief of D's and nixed it. I guess Deakins finally persuaded him."

"Deakins…" Sarah repeated.

"Yeah…Captain Jimmy Deakins." He sobered for a moment, and squeezed her hand. "I can't tell you how much it means that he went to bat for me. I just hope I don't ever let him down."

Sarah opened her mouth to tell Mike that she knew Captain Deakins, that he was her uncle, but she stopped when she looked at the earnest expression on his face. Mike didn't know about her uncle; her uncle didn't know about her relationship with Mike. Would it make it strange for them to begin working together if they knew? It might make things uncomfortable for both of them. Maybe she should give them time to get to know one another and establish a good working relationship before she told them. She smiled at Mike.

"You won't let him down, Mike. I know you're going to be a great addition to the squad. Congratulations. How are we going to celebrate?"

"Well, I've got…a few ideas," Mike told her, leaning over to engulf her in an embrace and covering her mouth with his.

******************************************************************

Annie woke up and lay for a moment, hoping she could just drift back to sleep. But she soon realized that wasn't going to happen until she made a trip to the bathroom. Before getting back in bed, she padded out into the hallway, to each of the children's rooms to check on them. She paused in each doorway for a moment, watching them sleep, feeling her heart fill with love for them. Climbing back into bed, she looked over at Bobby's broad back, covered by a tee-shirt. _He must be exhausted,_ she thought. A light sleeper, it was rare that he didn't wake up if she got up in the night.

Annie pulled the covers over her and scooted against his back, spooning his large body as best she could. Putting one arm around him, she dropped a light kiss on his back and then pressed her cheek against him. She closed her eyes and sighed in contentment as she felt the gentle rise and fall of his breathing. She had just drifted off to sleep when the telephone by the bed rang, startling her awake. Bobby was already reaching for it. Annie sighed in disappointment, knowing that a call at this time of night usually meant that he and Alex had caught a case. She rolled onto her back with another gusty sigh.

"Yeah, I understand. Well…if you think it will help….OK…I'll get there as soon as I can."

He hung up the phone and rolled over to pull Annie into his arms. "I have to go," he whispered.

"Was that Alex," she asked, nuzzling her cheek against his stubble.

"No…it was Carmel Ridge. They are having a problem with my mother and want me to come up there."

"Now? In the middle of the night?"

"They think she might calm down if I'm there."

"We could ask Alex to come stay with the kids and I could go with you," she offered. But she already knew his answer.

"That's OK, you don't need to go. I'll take care of it," he said.

He kissed her cheek and got out of bed. She lay and watched him get dressed. He sat on the bed to put his shoes and socks on. Before getting up, he leaned over and gave her a long kiss.

"Keep the bed warm for me," he whispered.

She watched him walk out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.

**End season 4**

**Next stop—season 5!**

12


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